h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Aw, what's the matter? I brought you a present ?

I don't want you to think I disappeared off the planet. I just have a horrendous work schedule. However, I am hiring an assistant, and will be able to update my site more often.

Ah yes Ender, i'm truely glad that you did that. Why, i have no clue.
The foe's gate is down, for sure. Let's go nova!

Fenny, don't sit there sobbing by the fishbowl... let me give you a crashcourse on lavalamp drinking. but first i have to get me into the mood, so spork, please... one gargleblaster on the rocks?

One for here, and one for the road... look, I've got keychains for everyone too... hmm... am I starting to sound like a Starbucks?

All the world will become a Starbucks. As salary employees are required to work longer and longer without overtime, and hourly employees are working multiple jobs to pay bills, sleep will be sacrificed to the almighty deity of consumerism. Coffee will be our lifeblood. Biscotti will be our ambrosia. With little time for mating, courtship will be squeezed into debates over whether or not "Frappucinos" are a food group. Starbucks will merchandise anything you will ever need to buy, with the Starbucks logo emblazened from here to Timbuktu. The Internet, housed within coffeehouse computers, and coffeehouse chats hosted on the Internet will be one with Starbucks.

You will know these things will come to pass when Bill Gates purchases Seattle, and the Starbucks franchise.

Rah Rah Rah!

But I'm missing one thing here. And, Ender, I have a hunch that the fact that I, young, connected and life-sailing individual, am missing that particular thing, might mean that your possibly dire predictions are a long way away.

The thing I am missing is what a Starbucks is. A supermarket franchise? Very well-known in your area? With imperialistic tendencies? And little respect for old values?

Well I've never heard of it. So it can't be all that bad.

Starbucks is a chain of coffee-shops. They are trendy, overpriced, and average coffee really. However, they have consumed a good portion of the country and grow rapidly.

Now I see.
Now I fear.

Yes... and they are very heavy on merchangising... you almost feel required to buy an x-large t-shirt and a coffee mug when you visit one. A four pack of their vanilla Frappuchinos, which are quite good, but not worth the price, are well over six dollars. It is quite pathetic.... go watch You've Got Mail (Meg Ryan, Tom Hanks, Parker Posey), and you'll get an idea of what exactly a starbucks is, even if it is parodied in a bookstore.

"I'm not afraid." -- Luke Skywalker

"You will be. You will be." -- Yoda

Every Barnes and Noble I have ever seen has either a Starbucks cafe in the store, or right next to one. I believe they have a partnership now. So, Bill Gates and Starbucks can begin to program am with progranda by infiltraiting the bookstores.

Well put

*shakily holds second gargle blaster (which should have been for the road but never left the party) up*

Ah shucks, the whole world is turning to shenshlessh drivel anyway. Might as well have a reasonably good Frappa while we go.

*peering at fish in bowl pensivley* Now they understand my need for lava. Laaa-vvaaaa!!!

Has someone been passing out Opium?
**looks in general direction of a passed out Ahdkaw, whose pockets seemed to have been picked.

*

Opium? Is that the essense of Opie, the red-headed kid from that Mayberry tv show?

not quite... good guess!

Whew! In that case, I haven't been passing any Opium around.

Speaking of that, will the lava lamp get passed around, or is one person going to hog it all?

I'm not gonna be the one who takes it away... I like my eyebrows

Watch out... watch out... there's a Greebo about!!!

Hi all... ~grin~... any doughnuts here??? ~bigger grin~