h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

We hold these Truths to be self-evident, that all Men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Poontang.

Too fat cooks will not fit through the kitchen door.

I shot an arrow in the air,
It fell to earth I know not where...
Oh!
Does any body know a good lawyer??

What therefore God has joined together, so he's(imaginary figure, as I'm an atheist) just another welder then eh!

What God has joined together let Norman put asunder.

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to witness the union of these two people in marital blitz.

If any man here can show just cause why these two should not be joined in matrimony.......he's a braver man than I am.

On the Good Ship Lollipop, it's a sweet trip to the dentist's chair.

In seeking wisdom thou art wise, in imagining that thou hast attained it, thou art a fool, I cover both

What therefore God has joined together, let no man take a gas axe to

llok at the s on that

Taff, please don't post things which could be offensible to other members. Ta.

Jab

i went with because i dont know the latin name for

it is a well known phrase or saying, and i did only change one word

To sleep, perchance to snore.

Taff

I thought your line was rather apt given that the RSPB garden bird count is on this very weekend.

How many were there? We once counted 14 long tailed on one peanut feeder.

And without wishing to drag this thread in an inappropriate direction, Taff reminds me of an overheard scenario.

First bloke: To be honest I think that physical attraction is all very well but you do want some intelligence.

Second bloke: I agree Its important that one's partner should be on a similar intellectual level.

Very attractive and shapely young lady walks past.

First bloke: Look at the brains on that.

Oh Come all Ye thoughtful.

Don't ypu think you dehumanise people when you refer to them as 'that' or 'it', the way you refer to objects? People are not objects. We're all supposed to be as friendly as we can on this site, treating others with respect, or the site will die.

it has been noted a man makes eye contact with a woman for 4.3 seconds when they meet, this increases to 8.4 seconds if he finds her attractive, but it drops to 0.0 seconds if she is a 'C' cup or above