h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I like women, but I can't wim only paddle

Reminds me of

Young man to his young lady: "Do you like Kipling?"

Coy young lady: "I'm not sure, I have never kippled."

- "But I have seen Charlotte Rampling."

Bertie Wooster: My manservant Cheese will take care of it.

Not a tweak except in a "visual" sense?

Palin lashes Obama at Tea Party

I cannot wait for that to appear on Youtube!!!

It wasn't a dark and stormy night.

Cousin Itt was a dark and stormy Knight.

I was a dark and stormy kiera knightlypmt

If at first you don't succeed
Try, try, try, to get somebody else to do it.

Another latest headline:

Costa Rica's Laura Chinchilla poised to become the country's first female president

That would be like Britain electing a Mr Weasel as Prime Minister!

Hang on, that has happened !

The Egyptians had some incompetent pharaohs. All anyone could think of to say about them was Tut, Tut!

"Oo! Ow! Ouch! Ow! Gorblimey!" - That's the Sound Of The Men Working On The Chain Gang. (song)

I'm singing in the rain, they'll nick the roof from over your head given half a chanceand they have

O! that this too too solid flesh would melt,
Thaw, and resolve itself into a six pack!


There are more things in heaven and earth,
Horatio,
Than are dreamed of in your nightmares.


The lady doth protest too much, as usual.

Coo coo ka choo... Gezundheit !

O! that this too too solid flesh would melt, I hate cooking turkey!

How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have haemorroids

I assume you've already had that old favourite...

Blessed are the cheese makers.

The voice of him who cryeth in the bathroom....

(We're all out of toilet paper! <grr)

Celebrity stalker is given a restraining order.

absent thee from Felicity awhile .

A Midsummer Night's Nightmare.