h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Thank you.


Apparently i talk too much & stop him "getting things done"....oh dear, how awful to have someone communicate with you, or ask (politely) what's on *his* schedule for today, so that i can do *my own thing* meanwhile.

It really doesn't help that i have no income; no home except via him: i want to be with him because i love him; not because i am financially dependent on him...that isn't his fault or mine, just The System.

How do others deal with this situation? Any advice welcome!

It's not the size of your pocketbook that defines a person, it's the size of their heart. You my dear, emotionally, have a big and loving heart. In that, you are richer than many people.

Perhaps you are too considerate, and that gives him some sort of bad conscience? Instead of asking his schedule first, say, "I was thinking of doing my cheeseboxes today, would that ruin anything for you?" (or whatever you wanted to do)

It gives you more selfconfidence to put yourself first, while still opening up for change of plans if necessary.

I found that I did kind of the same before, organising everybody elses wants, needs, whims and wishes, before deciding what I wanted. So in the end there was no 'me'. *and* my therapist (bless her) said that because I didn't seem to take care of myself, people around me felt they had to be responsible for my wellbeing - and didn't want to! So it all tangled up. Now, I'm a bit more responsible for me, and they don't have to worry as much, and everyone is happier. Me, my kids, and my love.

Love

F1926355?thread=5478302

mainly for Terri, but it's for everyone else as well

*Prepare for a rant; feeel free to rant also about anything which is P'ng you off!

1) WHY has my computer suddenly decided it needs me to scroll sideways before i can scroll up & down?

2) I have to admit i am P'd off that P is trotting off on holiday for two weeks in Norway; leaving me here to take care of the farm. Since i don't have transport; this means NO communication with humanoids; plus now dear Edda is gone, i feel rather vulnerable in the middle of nowhere, with no mobile phone.

Looking after this place alone means lots of heavy lifting stuff; just keeping the fire fed is a full time job, let alone feeding animals; pray we don't get more snow; if i fall over, lord knows when i would be found.

3) This sodding new sign in system is a total pain; i have to re-sign in each time *yet* it seems to remember my password. This doesn't seem logical.



With luck though, i may gain a new puppy out of it all. Me Want Wolfhound, or yellow Lab or 101 Dalmations please!



zdt

message past to Lil Terri

I'm using the new sign-in system and don't need to sign in every time.

I have to admit I don't really get the idea of needing separate trips, going away along for a length of time, etc. Especially when, as you say, one person is left home with less than reliable climate control during cold and potentially harsh weather.

Terri I have not noticed any difference when I have signed but then I had my password saved.

I had a very distracting evening with my neighbour going loopy on the telephone. I have got the day off my course and I did some homework this morning without any problems. I really do feel I am living in the twilight zone.

Hmm, the 'going away alone' thing gets to me also; but if he needs to, he needs to i guess...he's not really lived with a partner long-term before; so maybe needs Personal Space fom time to time.

BUT we have a new puppy!!!!!!!!!!

She is a golden retriever, very fat & fluffy & happy, bouncy, she's learned in three hours 'sit' 'fetch' give' no' & she is lovely!!! Photo's via email/facebook)

Provisionally named "Woollie" 'cos she's like a big fluffy ball of wool. Yoda is somewhat disgusted, Fritz is merely scared, but seems totally unaffected by anything, follows P around & once she learns not to pee on the rug, she should be great therapy i reckon.

The Norway trip *may* be affected by the fact that EyeLand Air Traffic Contollers are on strike...ho hum; i will make an extra big box of sandWitches for him to gobble in Dublin Airport.

The main reason he's going is to be with his son; V, who has just moved to Norway & is feeling rather lost, plus visiting his Mother, who is 93 & just had two major operations.

Snow hs thawed here at last & we did shopping today, si i should be OK in practical terms; but will still feel<....ah, can't find the right words; i will need 'you lot' >...a lot.

zdt

Congrats on the new puppy!

I'm trying to go without caffeine this week, which has me rather groggy.

I've read that an apple in the morning can wake you up better than a cup of coffee.

I don't drink caffeine so I couldn't say.

It can't hurt.

It's wonderful news about the puppy, sounds so adorable. I love labrador's and retrievers as they are so affectionate.

No caffeine? I'd die.

The puppy sounds cute! Hope to see photos soon.

Puppy is indeed extremely cute; but rather smelly, combination of living in a cowshed & not yet fully housetrained; i hope to get this done while P is away; she's getting used to being dragged outside to pee & poo gradually; but it's exhausting work, as all new puppy-owners know, being alert to the first signs & getting them out there before 'little accidents' happen!

I gave her a bath yesterday & tonight; informed her "You are a Retriever, you are supposed to *like* water!"

P's plane has arrived safely in Oslo; which is a great relief; so now all i have to worry about is the train journey to Trondheim; whether he breaks his bones skiing ; the flight back etc......why *do* i worry so much; any ideas?

When you think of how 'Us lot' are doing & compare to most Haitians; it seems trivial; but nonetheless, i worry about loved ones, maybe too much.

Pix of pup may have to wait a while, have some but can't seem to access them to send yet, probably pressing the wrong buttons! By the time i work out what to do, she will probably be twice the size; i'm sure she's grown in the last 24 hours; she has enormous paws.She is very active, has discovered the cat's toybox, other than their she rolls around with a giant teddy bear; which she abuses horribly, drags him around, bonks him, chews his ears etc. That's when she's not attempting to chew my arm; i look like i've been attacked by a with a wrist fetish!

Yoda now has a telephone screwed to the side of her viewing platform & a modem inside; jeez, hi-tech or what?

(Of course none of us spoil our animals)

zdt

Awwww....some lovely anonymous person has sent us a book called "Dog Heaven"in the post. No note, no idea who sent it, but it's lovely; brought tears to my eyes.

I read a bit of it out to P on the phone, he was very moved, both by the lovely words & the fact 'someone' cared enough about doggie loss to do such a thing.

There are good people in the world.

zdt

Hiya Terri! Good talking to you some tonight.

Hi JEllen!

Yes, it was lovely!

Thanks for posting on that thread i mentioned; glad to see you finally managed to work around what is presumably the new system.

Sleep well

zdt

Very icy here in Memphis tonight. Brrrr.

Snow again here & more forecast for next few days.

So i've been out feeding etc, Woolie Bear enjiyed this very much, i didn't enjoy being chased down a slippery slope by a cheeky donkey though!

Time for a rant, sit back in your seats

Since i don't have the world famous Habitual residency here, i don't get Social Welfare, Disability benefits etc. one of the reasons they rejected me was "You came here expecting to depend on State benefits". that is NOT true, i would love to work; but know my limits regarding the leg stuff, no transport, days when i have no energy & feel awful etc. But i can do suitable work & have been actively looking for such.

**I've found a job i could do & enjoy, Community Artist, working with folk on Social Welfare, benefits etc in Ireland....but in order to get the job, i have to have been receiving Social Welfare benefits *myself* for a year. What about those others out there who also haven't got Habitual Residency who would probably be delighted to have something to do? This system is just plain WRONG!

31) City Artsquad requires community artist for Community Employment Scheme*

Applicants need to qualify under community employment eligibility. Must be in receipt of a social welfare payment for one year. Time spent on third level allowance and casual also qualify. Please contact Fiona Clarke on 4547026 or forward your cv to [email protected].
http://www.activelink.ie/node/1035


So: I can't even apply for this post because i have NOT been in reciept of social welfare payments for at least a year.



zdt

Terri dear, you have two problems that aggravate each other.

#1 you have no money

#2 you are honest

Bad luck.