h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well - neither are being terribly responsive right this moment - though maybe Emily likes that?

*steals the Minstrel Jim-LOF was balancing and swallows*

Well... I'm not too sure I'd want to consort with Mr. Tumnus, still or no.

Jamie - now that's another matter... if only he'd bloody well turn up. It's all very well having all and sundry licking chocolate sauce from your naked body when your lover of choice has buggered off...

What exactly is wrong with Mr. Tumnus? Except for his cloven hooves?

(Side note: friend of mine only allows people with certain features to enter her room - one of which is cloven hooves. Another of which is a big one (a trunk of course... ) )

Well I'm here now... Hooray...

Emily, am I pleased to see you or did I just put a canoe in my pocket... DOWN BOY, DOWN...

Hi there, Jamie, like the beard... nothing else...

Emily, meet me on my horse in... eight seconds...

Jamie

a) That's obscence, and I would remind you that YK here is of a tender and impressionable age
b) I can't ride
c) You've already gone
d) What the hell... I'm coming... (no pun intended, thank you)

Bugger. I spelt 'obscene' wrong.

For God's sake, can't some gay people turn up... Or at very least can't somebody bring a vacuum cleaner? I'm getting bored here...

i've brought the dyson, as it seems that em and jim are the only ones getting off....

...i'm going down the pub, anyone want to join me?

I should be so bloody lucky. Ed, I forbid you to go to the pub.

Oh God... I just had these visions of Minstrel-flavoured semen...

[YK] Oh, bugger my age (Pun intended), which is now 15!

Oh happy birthday whenever. I suppose you can join in now.

{Hmm - only a year underage then... sorry YK - but you're still illegal... }

Is it true that your semen starts to taste of what you eat? So, theoretically, if you ate enough chocolate, eventually...

I will absoluetely catagorically not eat chocolate until my semen tastes of chocolate, not now, not ever...

Not that it would make much difference...

Jamie.

P.S. I can ride... You seem to forget that my grandmother breeds horses... Yes I had gone, but I'm here now... and I forget the rest...

Further P.S... No male worth speaking of is still tender and impressionable at fifteen...

I never said that you couldn't ride, only that I can't.

Gem is participating on the phone by proxy. She says she thiks she's bregnant. Don't ask.

Bregnant?!

Jamie: lie down. Now. Stay still.

A film star, maybe: Beryl Bregnant - star of "Play Bike"?

Am lying down... However my back is now recovered... So lets just get down to a good hard shag...

Jamie.

P.S. Bregnant... Do tell... Or don't if you've been sworn to secrecy...