h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Ma Chao] "Wutian Spirits" means alcoholic beverages from Wutai, not the spirits of our departed ancestors...
*Takes a long swig.*
[Ma Chao] I think that's the last of it... anyone got any more?

[Furr] Baileywick...?

:: The short rotund Henchman riches into his bag o' tricks and produces three wineskins, ninety-nine flagons of ale, and a bottle of chianti neatly wrapped in a wicker. He also produces a candelabra and sets it on the checkered tablecloth covering the table he pulls from the bottom of the bag. ::

[Baileywick] 'Stat 'nuff to quell yer thirst, Siors, or shall I build a right smart d'still'ry fer ye, as well?

[Furr] Food perh--

[Baileywick] Venison, bison, or boar? As a side, pr'aps ye'd dew wid some fine red potatoes, cabbage, and yeast bread?

:: Before anyone can assent or dissent, he pulls each of these things out on steaming platters. He deftly deals out dishes and utensils to each person present. ::

[/Furr & Baileywick]

[Ma Chao] I'm impressed...
*examines the food.*
[Ma Chao] But not hungry. I've trained my metabolism so I can go without food. It means I tend to miss meals...

[Ribald] GIMME SOME! [gobble, snarf, snap]

[Eric]I'll take some wine and perhaps a little venison

:: Furr Purrfickt snatches a haunch of the venison, devours it, then quaffs several of the wineskins. He sits back against the tree with a slaked, smug look. ::

[Furr] PrrrrRRrrrr-->BurP!<--rrrrrRRRrrrr...

[Baileywick] Seconds is avail'ble fer 'ose 'at's got good manners. :: Casts a deprecating glance at Furr. :: All others--"the kitchen's closed".

[Furr] Ffair ffellow trravelerss, we musst conssiderr our options at thiss point. We know the sstrronghold of Galyana iss beset by the Black Legiown and may not withsstand the onsslaught verry much longerr. Alsso, we have sseen firrsthand that Correllia--the nearresst ally that could possibly prrovide any sstrength to our causse--has alrready fallen underr the contrrol of these evil forrcess. Taking sstock of our own parrty and our combined abilitiess, Ai put it to yeou that, alone, we arre no match for the sswelling rrankss of the Black Legiown. We musst find ssuitable assisstance in eitherr sstrrength or numberrss in orderr to prrevail againsst whomeverr is orrchesstrating thiss madness. Which of yeou has an idea that will turrn the tide in our favorr?

:: He leans forward, the flickering of the campfire glinting off his pale blue eyes, and stares earnestly at each of you in turn. ::

[/Furr & Baileywick]

*Bahamut's Magicite begins to glow. A reptilian voice rings out...*
[Bahamut] FIND MY KINDRED. THEY WILL LEAD YOU TO GLORY... OR AT LEAST A VALIANT DEATH...

[Furr] ::gasps:: No... It cannot be...

[Baileywick] ::grins and reachs for the rubber snake:: Can't be any worse'n 'is li'l critter, aye, guv'nor?

[Furr] ::bristles at Baileywicks running gag:: Grrr... Ma Chao? Iss there help for us from Bahamut? Do Ai ssensse rightly our next desstination may be the Blade Mountainss?

:: There is a palpable silence amongst the adventurers as the full import of the situation begins to sink in. The crackling of the fire is the only sound for quite some time as each member considers the cost of the next decision. ::

[/Furr & Baileywick]

[Ma Chao] What choice do we have? We have no army, the only thing that could possibly save Galyana are the Dragons...

[Furr] Rreptiless... Verry larrge rreptiless! :: He shudders. :: Rrrreeowrrr! Ai will NOT like thiss...

[Baileywick] :: Shakes the rubber snake, but Furr bats it out of his hand. :: Ow! A wee bit of a jest, tha's all, guv'nor. No need to get all persnickety...

[/Furr & Baileywick]

[Bahamut] SHOW A LITTLE COURAGE, KINDRED. MY CHILDREN ARE NO THREAT TO YOU...
[Ma Chao] It can wait 'til morning.
*Curls up in his sleeping bag, and falls asleep.*

[Ribald] G'night, everyone. [enters his own sleeping bag]

[The rest of the party does so. Fade out. A short tune plays. Fade in; it is now morning.]

:: Furr Purrfikt rises early, stretching langurously as only a feline is capable of. He pads off quietly to a stream to drink and drive the sleep from his eyes, knowing the trek ahead will require his constant vigilance. Refreshed, he returns to the camp and determines to waken his Henchman, Baileywick. He steps gingerly over to a large bulky bundle on the ground and--in an attempt to repay some of the debt of last night's defamation--puts a boot to the sleeping form. ::

[Furr] Rrisse up, Baileywick, yeou ssleepy headed Henchman!

:: There's a muffled grunt from the body, followed by an expletive of great proportion, and Ribald throws back the covers staring maliciously at the cretin who would wake him thusly. Someone behind Furr clears his throat; it's Baileywick, awake and dressed and loaded with all his and Furr's worldly goods. ::

[Baileywick] Beggin' m'lords pardon, are ye ready to travel the byways...yet?

:: Furr whips his back and forth between Ribald and Baileywick and in the end just hangs his head in shame. He mumbles... ::

[Furr] A thoussand parrdonss, Rribald. Ai was not awarre...

[/Furr & Baileywick]

*Ma Chao had wakened a few minutes earlier, and was having apples for breakfast in a nearby tree. He was also thinking of dragons.*
[Ma Chao] I wonder... Can we save Galyana with Dragons? I mean, what if it isn't enough...
[B-voice] Have faith. They will win us the day.

[Ribald] Well, guess we'd better get going, then! [gets up] Lampwick, put all the stuff away!

[He does.]

[Eric]I had such a weird dream last night. Somthing to do with a figure reathed in fire and a thousand year winter

[Furr] Ai have ffound that ssome drreamss have grreat imporrtance in heightening one's awarreness of coursses of action possible in crritical ssituationss. Erric, do yeou rrememberr any otherr detailss of yeour drream? Try to rrecall the ffeeling, the mood, the actionss, the figurres involved. Think. Do yeou rrecall any morre?

:: Furr Purrfikt stands poised, waiting expectantly, daring to hope for one more morsel of information that would provide the edge the party needed. ::

[/Furr]

[Ma Chao] We'll have time to worry about that later... Let's go!

[Baileywick] Ye heard the man; let's go. :: Baileywick hefts his load of goods and begins to tromp onto the trail and, as he passes Furr Purrfikt, 'inadvertantly' manages to tromp on his tail. ::

[Furr] YeeeoOOoowrrr! :: Purrfikt spins round, fangs bared, claws extended...then halts, realizing a shredding this early in the morning may be uncalled for. Besides, who'd want to carry all that junk about for endless miles. ::

[Baileywick]

[Furr] Ma Chao! :: He bounds up beside the Dragoon with ease, walking abreast and chatting. :: Iff Ai have to deal with these rreptiless--and Ai see Ai do not have much choice in the matterr--then tell me morre about them. Ai want no majorr ssurprrisess when we arre amongsst them. What morre can yeou rrelate about their demeanorr and their mannerrs? What hope have we that we can ssway them to help uss frree Galyana and rrid the land of the Black Legiown?

[/Furr & Baileywick]

[Ma Chao] Well, let's see... they're about 45-50ft long, they breath fire, they eat entire armies, which helps keep the Orc population down... that's it. In fact, I'm not sure if they are real dragons. After all, Dragons are supposed to be wise and cunning, and capable of speech. These one are smart, but 'animal' smart, know what I mean? "Drakes" I think they're called.
[Bahamut] MY KINDRED HERE ARE INDEED NOT TRUE DRAGONS. THEY'RE GIFT OF MIND WAS LOST OVER TIME. HOWEVER, THERE ARE SOME WITH THE GIFT LEFT. THEY LOVE RIDDLES AND GOLD ABOVE ALL ELSE. THIS HAS MADE THEM MANY ENEMIES WITH THE DWARVEN RACE.
[Ma Chao] Are there any true Dragons up there?
[Bahamut] YES, AND IT IS THOSE YOU MUST FACE.
[Ma Chao] Oh goody...