h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What rating of fuse? If we need a direct replacement for a (still folded) paperclip, we're looking at something between 30 and 50 amps.

*nursing his knee*
I think there might be some fuses in the fuses room. Seems like a logical place for them. As for size, I have no idea, lets just get a bunch and try them, and see what happens.

Hell, I can't even remember exactly what that fuse was really for, because the lights still work, guess we'll find out though.

(Walks into door)
*OUCH!*

I think I may have found out what the fuse was for!

(Starts shoving, pulling and sliding door, to no great effect...)

Oh no...we can't be stuck in here with a rapidly decreasing supply of cheesy biscuits!

OK...OK...there'll be some way we can get a fuse...

umm...

...er... that's probably for the gravitatonal compensator... 32.691A, I believe...

Aha! I have it...

if I get this crowbar, I can crouch and break the window in the door... then, I can get out, avoid all the guards noticing me with a nasty looking crowbar, gat a fuse, bring it back, and fix the door. How does that sound?

I've got a better ides...

(Takes crowbar, wraps dry paper towels round it and uses it to short out the fuseholder - doors fly open, narrowly missing Engels)

Go get a fuse, and we'll swap it later

*ducks*
This is getting crazy. Any one up for drinks? I'll go and get some along with a fuse.

or maybe we should just leave the crowbar, nice decoration I think.

Ooh... free drinks... yes, guinness please!

I'll have a pint of Benedictine, please - the proper stuff, not the watered-down version sold to American tourists... Thanks

*Big C Computer beeps into action*
[Pr. C. Tonks would like to appologise for his lack of participation in this forum. This is due to his being on holiday. There are also temporary technical difficulties regarding his ISP, so he won't be back for a short while. We thank you for your understanding, wether it is existant or not.]

*clicks her fingers & everybodies drinks appear...especially one for BigC who sounds like he might need it after his ISP troubles are over*

*Wanders in after hearing clibking of fingers. Sees drinks appearing and catches on in mid air. Sit's back and relaxes.*

*Relaxes too far and falls off chair. Gets up looking mightily embarresed.*

Hi ya folks.

Hey, I had forgotten about the clickity-drinks, kind of lickety-split
Saved me a trip, thanks E

*catches his PGG, drinks it and passes out*

That's what I'm here for...

*clicks Engles a hangover cure for when he comes round *

(Peet drains most of the Benedictine, and holds the pint glass above his mouth, waiting for the last few tablespoonfulls still attached)

Hmmm, Sticky!

*wakes up several hours/days/weeks or whatever 'time' is in this room*

Wow, I feel amazingly refreshed

Okay, so we have problems with timescale-distortion in this room now. If you'll just get me that fuse we'll have that sorted out in no time...

Anyway, I need to make some adjustments...

*Takes out a very large toolbox, and pulls out something that looks like a very horrible torture implement. Starts fiddling around with projections on the sides. Suddenly there is a flash of white light, which temporarily blinds everyone. When they can see again, the machine is gone, Krans is sitting on the floor with soot all over his face and his clothes and hair messed up, and the tea, vegetation, and tribes of pygmies living in the cupboards have reappeared.*

Whoops.

Hey, folx, I may have spotted one of the sources of dimensional instability around here... I was looking at the sewer plans, wondering where the outflow went, and just noticed the whole sewer system empties itself into a Klein bottle! (I should have been suspicious when I noticed the plans were printed on a Mobeus strip...)

Hmmmm... perhaps the answer is to use a Coca-Cola bottle instead...

*Bloke in blue overalls walks in with clip-board, pulling another large trolley*

Aha, my new multi-dimensional anti-dislocator. Just put it there, please.

*Bloke leaves.*

Aaaarrgh! NO MANUAL!!!!