h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Thanks, I really needed to be reminded of that, Moritati.

It's not British, it's Methodist. Surely someone here can discern the difference besides me. Or should we all recite the Nicean Creed together to jar our collective memories?

Sometimes I wish those internet search engines would develop severe amnesia whenever the keywords entered yielded anything relating to John Wesley.

Now, for those of you who are totally confused, just remember this. There's a reason they named him John Wesley Hardin and it wasn't to elaborate his britishness.

Now, why don't we bash Texans for awhile. I really think that might be more fruitful. I not sure why but I trust it'll come to me.

Thanks for your support.

Unitarians have "adapted that particular hymn...

I provide the words forthwith...

Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"
By Rev. Christopher Raible

Coffee, coffee, coffee
Praise the strength of coffee.
Early in the morn we rise
With only thought of thee.
Served fresh or reheated,
Dark by thee defeated,
Brewed black by perk or drip or instantly.

Though all else we scoff we
Come to chuch for coffee;
If we're late to congregate
We come in time for thee.
Coffee our one ritual,
Drinking it habitual,
Brewed black by perk or drip or instantly.

Coffee the communion
Of our Uni-Union
Symbol of our sacred ground,
Our one necessity.
Feel the holy power
At our coffee hour,
Brewed black by perk or drip or instantly.

Unitatians, in case you hadn't guessed, really, really like their coffee.

At our services, coffee hour afterwards is the highlight of our morning. Quite often, coffee hour is actually longer than the services. It gives us a chance to enjoy the fellowship of the people we genuinely like, a chance to talk about current affairs, and a chance for the children to mingle with the adults, all over coffee and snacks....

When I went out to Iowa to visit my family, I went with my aunt to her Lutheran church. I was looking forward to having coffee afterwards. I was looking forward to chatting over coffee.

Much to my surprise, as soon as the service ended, there was a mad rush for the door and the place emptied out in about 3 minutes flat!

Unfortunately, on occasion, people have taken exception to hearing the coffee song sung. We had one woman storm out during a service when the song was sung. She never came back, but did send a rather scathing letter denouncing us for "desecrating" the original hymn.

I could understand if we were using the hymn to make fun of Christians or a particular church. But we were singing about our love of coffee which is part and parcel of our enjoyment of the fellowship of members of our congregations....

F19585?thread=314568

Ah, UUs, yes, I've been one of those since a year ago last April I seem to recollect, but I've never heard the coffee song. I did hear a slave spiritual desecrated because somebody evidently objected to "Nobody knows but Jesus". Sometimes Unitarians get as doctrine bound as the next fundamentalist.

One of them got himself appointed as agent of an indian reservation and promptly started a policy of no farming, no annuities. The fact that had the land been farmable and of sufficient extent to allow practical agriculture, it would have been tilled long before he arrived evidently never entered his little goggle encrusted head.

Fortunately, after a year or so of uniformly failed harvests, he was replaced by someone nearly as blindered but with a tad more farming experience. I'm not sure of the denomination. It hardly matters in the context of the outcome which was uniformly dismal.

But no matter, we should concentrate on mainstream denominations that put Puritan ritual above everything but the offering plate. I'm sure your Lutherans didn't escape before the offering was collected in the name of the three person god, Moe, Larry and Curly.

However, one should be honest now. Was the sermon really that good or do you suspect they all had a football game to attend?

I once assisted a Presbyterian clergyman in translating his blather into High Lakota. It was a daunting task to say the least. I could recall no words for sin, guilt, god, marriage, salvation, confession or any of the other concepts clergyman use to try to scare people into conversion. I admitted as much and he advised that all that was really necessary was that the prospects confess their faith in the Lord Jesus Christ as their personal savior.

I finally bartered that down to letting him sprinkle their heads with water from the men's lavatory tap at the mission. A fine time was had by all, but the stupid idiot absolutely refused to distribute any presents. I had to explain that he was still living with his mother and couldn't afford presents but that the people shouldn't hold that against him or Jesus.

But they saw through the subtrifuge almost immediately so I had to buy a few cases of beer to keep my hair. The pastor was appalled to say the least but I explained that these people were recalcitrant catholics and needed something to clarify the Eucharist other than soda crackers and grape juice. Ah, the vissitudes of religious diplomacy.

Re: UU Coffee time -

Our congregation also seems to have an unnatural bosession with quilting .

Re: the fast exit from my Aunt's Lutheran church service... I askd and my Aunt said it has ever thus.... they just like to get the hell... heck... outta there as soon as they can. The kids often go out to Pizza Hut and have lunch with the Pastor afterwards, though.

The one thing I find about UUs is that if, like me, you have grown up UU, you tend to be a lot less likely to object to the mere mention of certain words or the sight or vertain objects commonly associated with religion.... such as God, prayer, worship, stained glass, pulpit....

Our Fellowship is very small and, until recently, did not have a choir. We depend on recorded music for most of our services. I co-ordinate the music for services and I and another member alternate Sundays choosing the music for the services.

I remember that I once played, I think it was Bach, something involving the organ. We are not talking about "church" music, but just plain old classical music, played on the organ. Afterwards, someone came up and said "I wish I had known there was going to be organ music. I would have stayed home...". Apparently, she associated organ music with the Catholic church she attended as a child.

Personally, I take the "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" attitude about such things. Words are only words and, unless you are a believer, a crucifix is just two pieces of wood shaped like a cross...

The word "worship" for instance. You would not believe the number of people who object to using the word "Worship" in services or calling our services "Worship Services". They associate the word "worship" with praying or bowing down to a deity... In fact, the word "worship" merely means "ascribing worth" or something that is worthy.

worship [n.] |ETYM| Old Eng. , , AS. ; worth + <-scipe> -ship. Related to , and <-ship>.

By the by. I found this political cartoo.: http://public.fotki.com/ccnuggie/comics/gm030430.html

Once a year, one of our members turns into 'Reverend Jim-Bob' and we have a whole Southern Baptist style gospel service. I grew up SBC, so I think it's nifty, but there are plenty of people who skip because apparently their experiences were bad. Thank for the church bulletin, eh? I guess I feel enough ownership over my own spiritual experiences that I don't have any sort of religious jadedness, or something. Or maybe it's the armchair anthropologist in me that likes seeing humans do different things. Or maybe it's the same kind of voyeurism that makes me like going to random religious events and collect Catholic iconography. I forget my point. Well, in any case, I tend towards the same 'sticks and stones' way of looking at things as well. The only thing that bothers me a little is that the kids call it church, and I don't know what else to call it, and I would really rather people not assume that I'm Christian.

My step-dad was a Zoroastiran and my mother the daughter of a Presbyterian minister from Scotland (who lapsed when she came to Canada) and my birth-fater was an Atheist, so I grew up in a fairly religiously-diverse (diverely religious???) home.

I remember when I first heard that Unitarians usually didn't think of themselves and Christian.... I was shocked and stunned that I wasn't "Christian"! How could this be!? When I finally thought about the meaning of "Christina" I realized that since I didn't believe that Jesus was my savior and all that, I was able to let it go.

I recall my father saying once that, back in the late 50s or early 60s, when he had worked with the Red Feather Appeal (an annual charitable fund-raising campaign) he had raised the most money in his canvassing area than any other area. He was given a plaque or something and after the presentation, some woman came up and said how wonderful it was that he had raised all this money... "It was a very Christian thing to have done."

My father responded with something along the lines of "Not bad considering I'm not a Christian..."

The woman got really angry, turned on her heel and stomped off, never speaking to him again....

As for it being called "church" I don't mind, I suppose since First Unitarian's original building was a traditional church. The minister wore vestments and the choir processed up the aisle during the service.

The only thing i really object to is the word "sermon". It isn't the word I object to, per se. It is that what is labelled a "sermon" in our services is more along the line of a talk than a traditional "sermon". I prefer the term "Discourse".

When I do the service, either as the Service Leader or actually speaking, I refer to it as "Discourse". The definition of discourse is "a formal, lengthy discussion of a subject, either written or spoken. (Archaic: The process or power of reasoning.)" which I think is better than "sermon"....

I also hate it when people say ".... Oh, like Rev. Sun Myung Moon?!"

"No... That is Unification. This is UniTARIAN! BIIIIIg difference!"

http://www.cbc.ca/cp/world/030907/w090734.html

That cartoon is brilliant!

We must not forget Afghanistan. I am not surprised by this story, it's sad but likely...

1

I suspect the Afghanistan story is more than merely "likely" sad to say. I'm glad to see the Taliban gone but what has replaced them is no better. And I'm ashamed that my country (Canada) is taking part now.

someone mentioned the royal canadian kilted yaksman song. It'll take forever to get that out of my head. Till later

So are we... New Zealand is sending troops to Afghanistan *and* Iraq - I am sad, it seems like a back down.

This is for you apparition...

http://carol.wins.uva.nl/~jvgemert/marieke/xtra.html

No, really, no need to thank me...

,

, thanks mudhooks. But now it's in my head again.

Della, If they're going to send troops, at least it's engineering.

It's different for Iraq. With all those speches aimed at the international community and the UN before the war and now the US is asking for help!?!

Yes the world should lend a hand... With one or two fingers extended. Maybe they'll learn something if, for once, the international community doesn't bail them out. Maybe they'll learn that war has consequences.

Apparition, that was the point....