h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'd told Star Wars never again, hurt me too many times, it wasn't right. Never darken my door again.

But Star Wars is trying to win me back:-

"Baby I've changed, I have given up Lucas, it'll be different"

Me

"I don't think so, you hurt me bad, you abused my trust, you hurt me. I promised never again." I shudder and remember the bad times.

Staw Wars

"C'mon baby remember what it used to be like, remember the good times? Remember Han shooting first? Remember taking out the Death Star? Remember finding out Darth was Luke's Dad? Remember Han saying "I know"?

Me

"Yeah but what about the Ewoks?"

Star Wars

"But that was just the Lucas talking, you know Lucas messes with me. I'm sorry but i'm done with that Lucas sh*t, never again. Think about the stuff I did when not on Lucas even in the bad years? Remember the game Tie Fighter, or Knights of the Old Republic, think about the Gennedy Tarkovsky animated Clone Wars or even the CGI Clone wars?"

Me

"Well that was all pretty awesome I suppose.... No STOP... JAR JAR"

Star Wars

"I promise you i'll never touch Lucas again, it'll be different, it'll be great. Just take me back? Please? Please I need you".

Me

"Well OK, but you hurt me again and we are done? You hear me Done? And if I see you with that Lucas I'm never gonna speak to you again".

FB

I've got a bad feeling about this.


Geggs

http://eventservices.disney.go.com/files/10905661.jpg

As I understand it, Lucas is to remain a creative consultant.

Yah boo.

Or should I say

To remain a creative consultant, Lucas is. This I have seen.

I, like many of my age grew up with Star Wars. It was *the* sci-fi film as a kid. And its sequels *were* sequels, every bit as good as the previous, except the Ewoks. Although I will admit to having an Ewok teddy bear, yes I was too old for it, I didn't care.

When they digitally remastered the original films, I bought the box set (on VHS no less!), they hadn't changed the films, they'd improved them! They'd added in the special effects that they weren't able to do at the time because technology wasn't there. They'd enhanced the films.

When Episode 1 was announced, I initially was ecstatic, I couldn't wait. When the trailers started to come out, I was awestruck. Then there was JarJar. A CGI Norman Wisdom. Star Wars had suddenly changed from epic Sci-Fi to Carry On Jedi.

Galaxy Quest sent up the Star Trek films, Episode 1 sent up the Star Wars films. And it didn't get any better. They used CGI too much, the who thing became unbelievable. The actors weren't really very good, and the merchandising?! I know that merchandising is a very lucrative market, that people want to buy things related to the films (remember that Ewok teddy bear?) but it was so completely over the top. You couldn't move in any type of shop for products covered in Star Wars logos. I felt I'd seen the film before even buying a ticket.

And it didn't live up to the hype.

And the following ones got worse.

Do I blame anyone for this, or do I think that it was selfish of me to expect my childhood dreams to remain, to not share them with others. I blame someone. I blame George Lucas.

He's been quoted as saying that he done this so that others can share them. Others did share them. The Star Wars films were some of the most successful films every made. *Everybody* (almost) had seen them, everyone I know grew up knowing the characters. We all shared the dream. But apparently it had to be changed so that a new generation could share it. Why? Not why should they be allowed to share it, but why did it have to change? I'm forever seeing kids in the street wearing Sex Pistol t-shirts, wearing Ramones, Rolling Stones, Led Zepplin t-shirts. They didn't have to be changed. They were remastered to bring the quality up, but they didn't have their lyrics changed. They didn't take the original masters and remove Jonny Rotten to replace him with Justin Timberlake to appeal to a new audience, they left it well enough alone and people *still* like them.

In short, George Lucas sold my childhood.

And now he's sold it to Disney.

I'm not a huge fan of Disney, they just don't seem to understand that there is a real world out there (I know, I know) nothing bad every seems to happen in their films. No heroes seem to die, everything is always cutesy. They are dull. We all know that the good guys are going to win, the bad guys will repent or be soundly beaten, and everyone will live happily every after. Real life isn't like that, and family films didn't used to be like that.

Family films used to be films that all the family *could* enjoy, they've now however turned into ones where the kids enjoy it and the parents pay for the popcorn.

There are a few exceptions to this, the Toy Story series for instance. But these are so few and far between that I don't hold out any hope.

Well on the positives Disney have handled Pixar pretty well. We got Up, Wall-E and Toy Story 3. And whilst Cars 2 was rubbish and Brave a little dissapointing some of the upcoming films on their roster suggest to me Pixar could be back.

Similarly Diosney have handled Marvel Studios very well, let them do their own thing.

I can't help thinking it is possible, that new Star Wars films sans Lucas could be boss. I'm excited dammit, and I had promised never again.

FB

Embrace the Dork Side, Luke

So anyway here is the Star Wars new trilogy i'dl ike to see, draws on some ideas form expanded universe but is essentially a new story:-

Set 70-100 years after Jedi to cut down on thel likelehood of rubbishly shoe horned cameos.

A ver elderley Luke is close to death and heads a new but fragile Jedi order, which is part of a new but fragile Republic.

The republic has external threats, from remnants of the Empire etc and maybe something new. And of course there are issues around the Drak Side for the new young recruits in Luke's jedi order.

Something like that could be brilliant I reckon.

FB

I must admit I heard "Star Wars fans will be delighted to hear..." on the radio this morning and thought "Will they? Will they really? Or will they shudder and moan in the knowledge that, even though they know what it'll be like, some small part of them, deep in their heart of hearts, will hope. And that hope will be stamped on and squashed after they crack up and see the next movie."

That's what I thought.

Deb

This is genuis. There are seven parts to it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxKtZmQgxrI&feature=youtube_gdata_player

FB

https://twitter.com/theaarondouglas/status/263421357252022273/photo/1/large

BWHAAHAHHAAHAHH


Zach Weiner said this, "Worrying that Disney will ruin Star Wars is like worrying that a second iceberg will dive down to hit the Titanic."

This is exactly how I feel. I loathe Disney. I'm not saying I hate all Disney films, but I do hate the company and what it has done, especially concerning their lobbying to extend copyrights in perpetuity, but I digress.

I am an EX Star Wars fan. I was the perfect age when the first Star Wars (and no, I'll never call it "A New Hope") hit the screens. I was 10. I watched it as many times as my parents would shell out the ticket price to get a couple of hours respite from me begging them to see it again. I grew up watching the original trilogy and loved each one. Then, Lucas kept ing with it. I'm proud to own a pre-special edition letterbox set of VHS tapes of the original trilogy, even though I don't even have a VHS player anymore because that is an historical artifact of a magical time when Han still shot first and Jabba didn't do a cameo on Tatooine. There was NOTHING wrong with the original films that needed to be fixed or enhanced.

But then came Ep: 1. Seriously, it was much worse than just Jar Jar. Midichlorians?! Anakin built C3P0?! Seriously, the story sucked! I just couldn't care about that kid. (BTW, Jake Lloyd, the kid that played Annie retired from acting in 2002 because of bullying and the stress and destroyed all his SW memorabilia and refuses to watch the films as he finds them too "creepy".) I watched Ep: 2 under protest being promised that there wouldn't be too much Jar Jar (there was.. any Jar Jar is too much Jar Jar). Nope, it wasn't any better than the previous abomination. I have not nor will I watch Ep: 3. I'm done. I won't even watch the original films I've soured so much on the franchise. If I ever in the future decide I want to return to a galaxy far far away, I'll go find an antique VHS player and watch my boxed set.

I think it should work well, the basic outlines of the 'last' 3 films have been done by Lucas.

As long as he isn't to involved in script and overall plot development it should go well...otherwise too much involvement will make 7-9 too much like 1-3.

The example of what Disney has done with Marvel shows they know what they need to do.

They just need to get a directors/writers who understand Star Wars and what made 'the original Trilogy' so good.

We can hope that the films are more 'real', less CGI based, people acting to people and things more than green screens.

Hollywood milk a franchise until it moos..

I'll go back to reading SF..That at least has less chance of disappointment.

I can see why Disney might be interested in taking this back to basics. Wasn't the original about jack-booted thugs in black taking over the universe?

They mostly wore white!

FB

But the bosses wore black!

Wouldn't that make for a great movie plot - evil fascist capitalists using black magic and giant mechanical elephants to crush opposition, all the while dressing in white and claiming to be the good guys?

The bosses mostly wore grey!


Geggs

The original was, at heart, an oater... a pure and simple Western cowboy flick... in space. It was a lot like Shane.

The bosses wore black, the mid-level wore grey, the foot soldiers wore white.