h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Good for soaking up juices.

Mmmm... fresh made baguettes... and sauces...

Some scientist seem to think there is a correlation between sex and population growth

Gay sex is our safest bet, then.

>Well, it didn't stop the ancient Greeks: they made dildos from bread.<

So that's hommus, greek yougurt, taramasalata and feta off my shopping list

Or BJs.

taramasalata?

Is it time for sex yet? ... err I mean supper? Something hot... and sticky... and sweet...

OK, 2legs. You can be the meat in our sangwidge.

meat... I could be a vegetarian if it wasn't for meat... and the gray areas of yeast... I mean... yeast is more like animal cells than it is like plant cells... so is eating yeast risen breads out for vegetarians... tricky... and beer... dredful... just dreful.... even the merest inkling of a slightest hint at the very slightest breath of a hint towards that line of thought... no... it doesn't bear thinkgin about... Where were we? ahh... meat...

Don't worry...yeast aren't beasties. They're fungi. That's how come vegetarians eat marmite. And bread, come to that. And beer.

Just the thing to go with a baguette dildo:

http://www.latestinbeauty.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/marmite_vaseline.jpg

But, fungi are more evolutionary closer to humans, than bacteria, or plants... etc... I mean, they're not actually plants... they're not bacteria... but they're not quite* animal... anyhow... probably a pretty slim chance of me ever going vegetarian

I'm sure I saw bacon flavoured lube, or condoms... or both on sale a while ago...
Mind, just because it exists is not justification for purchasing it. I mean... there is some really* weird stuff out there... I mean... yeh, we all know about the pony play stuff... which is kinda weird... but sex-dolls which are aliens? dildos as 'realistic', versions of certain parts of various animals... (seriously...), and forget the pony tail to complete your pony-play synarios... anyone for a bunny tail? or... and I stil don't quite know why this exists... a pig tail... seriously...

Actually. That reminds me, must clear my cookies and internet history on this machine again

"just because it exists is not justification for purchasing it. I mean... there is some really* weird stuff out there... I mean... yeh, we all know about the pony play stuff... which is kinda weird..."

This from the man who wrote the song "Handcuff my Pony"?

damnit!
There are shades of gray in sexual ... err... practises and ... err... tastes... and... devience.... its not just a black and white thing... Well, unless you buy the latex badger suit of course, then its pretty much a black and white and gray thing...

Hmm. Even if yeast are closer to humans than plants...we're still not that close. I certainly don't get a Christmas card from yeast.

True... But I don't get Christmas cards from Humans either... I only get a Christmas card from the Post Office, and the online err... retailer I use

I shudder to think what picture they use.

Well I thought it looked a bit like a Christmas tree... But other's seemed to think it was something else entirely... but... well, I mean... that'd bring water to your eyes...

2legs

Given your intrest in mycolology and interspecies relationships this may intrest you...

http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=stinkhorn+mushroom&um=1&hl=en&safe=off&sa=N&rlz=1T4SUNC_enGB390GB390&biw=1366&bih=641&tbm=isch&tbnid=DfFRRFKWsJu_uM:&imgrefurl=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phallaceae&docid=0uxyuLw8lVOIOM&imgurl=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5e/Phallus_impudicus_Stinkmorchel.jpg/220px-Phallus_impudicus_Stinkmorchel.jpg&w=220&h=293&ei=DUiMT-reKIjcsga9q7j4Cw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=385&vpy=133&dur=2328&hovh=234&hovw=176&tx=101&ty=141&sig=114082679199609823938&page=1&tbnh=145&tbnw=109&start=0&ndsp=22&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0,i:69