h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Somewhat refreshed are we?

Haven't dropped a touch, yerronner. I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

B

What, before you've even started?

And this saga goes on. An SFA report was utterly damning on what's been going on at Ibrox - http://www.scribd.com/doc/93212354/SFA-Rangers-Note-of-Reasons

The latest bid from the "Blue Knights" was thrown out because they effectively offered no money http://loveandgarbage.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/some-quick-thoughts-on-the-blue-knights-rangers-and-newcos/#comment-4340 ( I quite like the comment "It’s really not much of a quantum to approach creditors with now, is it? ‘Nil’. Is that a quantum? Can I interest you in Zero in the pound, sir? What if I throw in a moonbeam, an imaginary talking iguana and an eternal thought?"

An obese lady has been sighted clearing her throat in Govan.

I thought she'd already sung when HMRC rejected the administration deal. Today's news and the criminal investigation into Whyte is merely her encore.

The sort of turmoil that Rangers - or more correctly Rangers FANS are going through gives me no great pleasure at all. As a Wimbledon fan, I have been through terrible times (but let's keep some sort of proportion here - nobody died, nobody was maimed - but a football club is for life. You can't neccessarily say that about a wife now can you? If I had had 'Jane' tattooed on my bicep 30 years ago it would now be obsolete. 'Wimbledon' wouldn't!)

In the main football supporters make no sense. A football club is generally a company. Rather like Woolworths. And Wedgewood. And MFI. Are there any fanatical ICI fans out there? Tesco fans? Hewlett Packard Supporters Club members? (Apple may be the exception here).

If Rangers get stuck into the Scottish D1, they will have got away with it and the Rangers fans will find that they won't be chanting 'It only took nine years' on the terraces like we did. They will be back where they feel they belong in much less than that.

However, they probably didn't expect to be playing at Morton and Falkirk any time soon. They will almost certainly storm right back into the Scottish Premier League in the first season.

The enormous hit to SPL finances will be short lived.

And Rangers fans will be able to chant 'It only took one year'.

PP

At every step of this, there's been a feeling that Rangers would somehow get away with it but time and again things have turned out differently. Rangers FC do not exist. They're gone. Liquidated. What is left is a company currently called Sevco 5088 which owns a crumbling stadium with huge overheads on worthless land, a sports training facility and one confirmed player (Lee Wallace). They hope to inherit SFA membership but that may well be stripped from the Oldco before it can be transferred. They have been unable to get back into the SPL, now they must hope a space opens up in the SFL for which they can apply. Going straight into the SFL at Division 1 level would require a one year notice period of a change in SFL rules, which would in turn require 22 of the 29 SFL clubs to vote in their favour. Two have already said no to the idea, it only takes another 6 and that idea is dead and why would any div 2 or 3 club vote for Rangers to leapfrog them?

There is a very real chance there will be no team related to Rangers playing at Ibrox next season, or possibly any season for a very long time.

I've misunderstood the situation.

I thought that there was now no chance of Rangers playing in SPL but that they would probably gain entry to SD1.

However, history suggests that there will be a club related to Rangers FC. The club isn't the ground, players or bank balance. The club is a rather intangible thing that lives in the hearts and minds of the fans.

AFC / FC / Sporting / whatever Rangers 2012 will almost certainly form and take the place of what used to be Rangers. Perhaps it WILL take nine years. But I doubt it.

PP

Well, in the spirit of Wimbledon, maybe the company can relocate to East Kilbride, rename themselves the East Kilbride 'gers and then claim they've won all those trophies that actually someone else won

The SD1 line has been peddled heavily by the red tops, who have been proven wrong at every single turn so far. The whole affair has shown the Glasgow based media to be shockingly biased and frankly inept.

I agree that something related to Rangers will exist, probably several versions given the divided factions in the Rangers support.

I rather doubt that the word "Sporting" will appear in any of their names though. Expect "Loyal", "1690", "WATP", "Red Hand" and "Govan" to feature heavily.



Breaking News: Following Syria's expulsion, Sevco 5088 have applied for the vacant position in the Arab League

Hahaha!

I'm so pinching that joke.

B

Know what? If Rangers' fan-base splits into half-a-dozen smaller clubs, that might actually be good for the Scottish game. They're so big that even a sixth of them would probably be reasonably competitive in Scottish football, but not so much that they'll ever dominate in such an unhealthy way again.
All you need is for Celtic to go in the same direction...

Anybody worried about Rangers fans shouldn't be too concerned. Here's a fine example - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7zw92lSNus&feature=player_embedded#!

That is *not* a piss-take. He recorded that soon after the club got into trouble and he hoped to raise some money with it for a fan's fighting fund.

Just caught a few seconds of Roddy Forsyth on the radio.

In essence he was saying that the SPL can't do without the money that Rangers bring to the table. If they start off too low down and take three years to get back up, clubs like St Mirren are likely to go to the wall.

PP

So in essence, St Mirren would go to the wall if they were relegated?

Does this not highlight the degree of financial mismanagement within the SPL that has led to the pursuit of TV money at the expense of the views of the fans?

I would be guessing that if St M were relegated, they would shed their greatest expense, the players on SPL money.

If they remain in the SPL they don't need to, in fact can't afford to because they need to stay in the SPL. But without the TV money, the books just don't balance.

Football finance is a mess.

PP

Well, the simple solution for all clubs in trouble financially would be to liquidate, stiff the creditors and spend a season in the First Division before returning to the SPL debt-free.

If it's good enough for Rangers ...

I work with a Dundee fan down here in Southernsoftyshire. He is of the opinion that Scottish football could do without both Rangers AND Celtic. I see his point - it would make the whole league more interesting. Then other teams would emerge (or re-emerge) and dominate. I'm old enough to remember when Aberdeen and Hibs had half a chance of winning the top Scottish league.

I have never got to grips with where the standard of Scottish football is pitched in relation to England. My Dundee fan thinks that Dundee would be a good Conference side - but then the default mood of football fans does tend to lean towards gloom about their own team.

My own team, English D2, lost a player to Celtic last season (actually, 'The Word On The Street' is that although he is a very talented player, he is a handful to manage so he was a temperament reject for us and by no means an ability reject). He seems to have found something of a place in the Celtic first team squad. At least for the time being.

What does that say about the standard of football in the SPL if one of the top two is happy to take a D2 player from England?

Where does the standard go with a possible outflux (?) of players from Rangers.

PP

My team, Falkirk, just lost our star striker to Brentford. Recently we have seen our players moving to Huddersfield and Sheffield Utd so I would say our level ability-wise is Div 1. Perhaps another way of looking at it would be wages. We have a wages cap of £500 a week compared to the English Championship average of £4k a week. Dundee of course pay more than anyone else in our division because they rarely concern themselves with paying debt

As to losing players to Celtic, it's hard to tell. Celtic buy players to compete in Europe and against Rangers. Their youth team would probably hold it's own in Div 1.

With Rangers gone, Celtic will downsize undoubtedly. For me, healthy competition is more important than quality. It's no fun seeing your team humped regularly by other teams who can afford far better players - but then again, it makes winning against them so much sweeter

Not so long ago Rangers were telling us Scottish football would flourish if they and/or Celtic were to leave for another league. They wouldn't lie, would they?