h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

DQ, give us a sec to shower and quickly pack a bag and I'l be over

I blame 2legs for my now very distracted thought processes...a and the unduely frequent occurance of leather PVC and in these thoughts

I further blame 2legs for my cold and its affecting my hearing, balance and general thinking abilities ,headhurts>

"due to an annoying cold"
Wouldn't it be nice to have a cold that just sat quietly in the corner and behaved itself.

i blame 2legs that the key beside the p is refusing 2 behave and therefore causing me to have to paste every time i need that letter!

mini

if its only text use 0 instead of o or O

I should give it a good stern talking to!

but it l00ks nasty! and i was having fun explaining p0pc0rn earlier, f0r which i blame 2legs.

mini

Using Alt0246 gives you ö if you don't mind the two dots.

meh, when i am finished for tonight i will give the puter a turn over and a good shake to get some of the crumbs out, that might help!

mini

But we'll all end up on the ceiling.

it will not be a lenthy process.

mini

Hmm, where have I heard that before?
I'm stapling this chair to the floor just in case.

I'm running out of staples and drawing pins, but the piano is nearly on the ceiling.... for which I blame 2legs
I also blame 2legs for it being late and yet it still seeming like a long while to lunch/breckfast, and for my not yet having decided on what to have; Scottish smoked salmon on toast, Scottish smoked salmon on toasted soda pharls, Chicken Tika sandwichs, or cheese with pickle in baguette, or something else nntirely... for which I blame 2legs.
I also blame 2legs for the economy, rising unemployment and house prices taking for ages to fall low enough for me to buy another house and probably not falling low enough anyhow
I also blame 2legs for blocked sinuses again and for beer... and pubs... and it being cold, and lemon juice, and not being able to find a relaly high quality Japanease soyasauce at the supermarket, and for the packet of pocket isissues not arriving with my grocerys today, and for there being too many differnt bottles of spices in teh cupbard which means it takes ages to find the right one and for the tin of powdered mustard which I've had for yeaars and for the crumbs on the kitchen floor, and for my ownly cleaning part* of th ebathroom today, and for my bedroom floor being covered in hair again and needing another sweep,a dn for the busted interconnect cable I found which was a good cable but now isn't cause its knackered, and for my haivng to replace this cable and for that costing and for the insubstantial nature of cheap rolls from the supermarket and for the rolls from the bakery being too damn big for some purposes, and for poor quality sausage rolls and my inability to buy any decent sausage meat to make tasty proper ones with and for this computer keybaord being knackered but also for the spare keyboard being a really cheapo one and for this not good one havin exta keys on it even though I only ever use a couple of them and I blame 2legs also for the radioactive fish in the street with laser beans, and for the poliece with the hedgehog detectors not doing anythign about the sleeping dogs that they just let lie in the street blocking the floating grayhounds from their ever upwards descent to the rodant runners racoon emporium and for the letterbox having gone on holiday again meaning ther eisn't anywhere to post letter until he gets back, and for the streamers and baloons still being on the lampost from last weeks lampost party parade in which the pants parade people paraded and partyied all night long.

I blame 2legs for the dream I had last night which somehow involved three tricked-out cars crossing from the right side of the bridge to the left side, while three bungee-jumpers sprang from the left side to the right side while singing Don't Cry For Me Angentina.

I blame 2legs for the family who barged into Boots as I was walking out
pushing people out of the way. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!
And the husband who trod on my foot in the process.

Why didn't you just exsanguinate them? Have you forgotten you're a ? I blame 2legs.

I blame 2legs for people always failing to 'barge' or 'push' into /through me due to my low centr eof gravity and generally being heavier than the person doign the rude pushing... and for my 'kill them dead on teh spot' line that only I can use 'waht, you blind or somethin?'
I blame 2legs for my waking up really early this mornign and feeling relaly cold and having to come down and drink two cups of steaming hot coffee and smoke cigarettes for a whiel before going back to bed
I also blame 2legs for the monster under the bed and the tiger in the kitchen.

I blame 2legs that this is the time of year that and cookies flow freely and I can't have any*













*Unless I know the provenence and can check if they're sugar-free, but I still can't just grab however much I want as I pass by, which is half the fun.

I blame 2legs for the way I almost choked on a piece of cheese (Dutch smoked, if anyone wants to know) when I read the bit about 'What, you blind or something?'

It works;; no one has ever managed to be able to speak if I saw that to em as they've jsut attempted to barge/push me out the way and then I give them my special paddington bear death gaze and carry on with whatever it was I was doing
I blame 2legs for paddington bear death gazes, and spicey lamb and rice and the difficultiy in timing when the rice i just* right so I don't open the pan lid too* early

2legs, I have a rice cooker I never use. You can take it back with you when you come see Amy P, Faith, and Notepad.

Better hurry though, if it is still here come Spring, it's going to be part of the yard sale.

I blame 2legs for under-used kitchen appliances.