A Conversation for Ask h2g2
Bloke Jokes.......
2legs - Hey, babe, take a walk on the wild side... Posted Jul 5, 2003
The smokible kind or the green stuff outside for use in laying on? 
Bloke Jokes.......
Chris.When you struggle with words and they put up a fight,Just keep ya mouth shut,it doesnt matter tonight. Posted Jul 5, 2003
hhhmmmm the women are taking over!!
Bloke Jokes.......
DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) Posted Jul 5, 2003
I second the motion that all women must comply to female directive 1) of the male only club rules.
-- DoctorMO --
Males only .......
IctoanAWEWawi Posted Jul 5, 2003
just to clarify.
Women are *wanted* here.
They just ain't allowed 
Scuse me whilst I go for a bout of furious wanting 
I just realise dhow suggestive the laugh smiley is!
Males only .......
Chris.When you struggle with words and they put up a fight,Just keep ya mouth shut,it doesnt matter tonight. Posted Jul 5, 2003
Hhmmmm Women are wanted "here" as well...but they never come. 
Males only .......
neri_aracro Posted Jul 5, 2003
So, what shall us guys talk about, yes thats right, just to clarify, I am male.
So, there is a choice of Testicular Cancer, Male Pattern Baldness, Beckham's transfer, equal prize money at Wimbledon!
Or all of the above!
Personally, I'd like to mention that (apparently) holding a baby actually lowers testosterone levels in men! Apparently this is true!
Males only .......
Chris.When you struggle with words and they put up a fight,Just keep ya mouth shut,it doesnt matter tonight. Posted Jul 5, 2003
I already opened a thread about the Beckhams!!!!
I will talk about anything but i dont know alot about testicular cancer!!!
Males only .......
HELP_IM_LOST (why are there not enough hours in the day?) Posted Jul 5, 2003
Why does it take a million sperm to fertilize one egg?.................. Because men will never stop to ask for directions!!! 
Bloke Jokes.......
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 5, 2003
(Complying with DoctorMo's female directive, is sitting at pc topless )
What is a man's idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.
---------------------------------------------
What do men and beer bottles have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up.
------------------------------------------------
What should you give a man who has everything?
A woman to show him how to work it.
------------------------------------------------
Why do black widow spiders kill their mates after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
--------------------------------------
How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
He buys 2 cases of beer instead of one.
-------------------------------------------
Why have men made such a mess of this world?
They're waiting for women to pick up after them.
------------------------------------------
What do you call a handcuffed man?
Trustworthy.
-----------------------------------------------
What's the smartest thing a man can say?
"My wife says.."
---------------------------------------
My secret fantasy is to have two men at the same time....
One cooking and one cleaning.
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Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
They all already have boyfriends.
---------------------------------------
The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke.
----------------------------------------
(To even things out a bit, I'll post a few woman jokes 
)
Emmily 
Not Bloke Jokes.......
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 5, 2003
Why does the bride always wear white?
Because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.
--------------------------------------
If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?
Made her chain too long.
-------------------------------------
How is a woman like a condom?
Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your penis.
-------------------------------------
How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"?
"Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.
----------------------------------------
Why are mens feet bigger than a womans?
So she can get closer to the sink.
-----------------------------------------------
If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
The swallow.
-----------------------------------------------------
Emmily
Bloke Jokes.......
DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) Posted Jul 5, 2003
well not sure were your going to post the women jokes , but I like your complience to the 1st female motion. lovly.
And may I say that most good guys don't go out talking to women, so you only really get to see/date/marry the scum of Males. why can'y you be more proactive and seek out a loving person, perhaps someone thats shy?
-- DoctorMO --
Bloke Jokes.......
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 5, 2003
DoctorMo the woman jokes are in post 51 above.
The bloke jokes are just jokes, not what I think of men. That there are more bloke jokes than there are woman jokes, maybe shows that you men take us more seriously than we take ourselves.
Emmily
Bloke Jokes.......
DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) Posted Jul 5, 2003
thats true, those jokes atualy feel like digs, and I feel I must defend mankind.
-- DoctorMO --
Bloke Jokes.......
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 5, 2003
Look on it as a form of flattery, that we take the time to devise jokes about 'you lot' and even buy Bloke Joke books, not that I have.
Emmily
Bloke Jokes.......
DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) Posted Jul 6, 2003
Ah well thats good.
-- Doctor|MO --
Bloke Jokes.......
Teuchter Posted Jul 6, 2003
What's a Scotsman's idea of foreplay?
"Brace yersel Jessie"
Bloke Jokes.......
DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) Posted Jul 10, 2003
There are many, my 
is an expert aparently.
-- DoctorMO --
Key: Complain about this post
Bloke Jokes.......
- 41: 2legs - Hey, babe, take a walk on the wild side... (Jul 5, 2003)
- 42: Chris.When you struggle with words and they put up a fight,Just keep ya mouth shut,it doesnt matter tonight. (Jul 5, 2003)
- 43: Researcher 226561 (Jul 5, 2003)
- 44: DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) (Jul 5, 2003)
- 45: IctoanAWEWawi (Jul 5, 2003)
- 46: Chris.When you struggle with words and they put up a fight,Just keep ya mouth shut,it doesnt matter tonight. (Jul 5, 2003)
- 47: neri_aracro (Jul 5, 2003)
- 48: Chris.When you struggle with words and they put up a fight,Just keep ya mouth shut,it doesnt matter tonight. (Jul 5, 2003)
- 49: HELP_IM_LOST (why are there not enough hours in the day?) (Jul 5, 2003)
- 50: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 5, 2003)
- 51: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 5, 2003)
- 52: DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) (Jul 5, 2003)
- 53: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 5, 2003)
- 54: DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) (Jul 5, 2003)
- 55: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 5, 2003)
- 56: DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) (Jul 6, 2003)
- 57: Teuchter (Jul 6, 2003)
- 58: DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) (Jul 6, 2003)
- 59: a visitor to planet earth (Jul 10, 2003)
- 60: DoctorMO (Keeper of the Computer, Guru, Community Artist) (Jul 10, 2003)
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