h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

People who use the last of the roll and don't get out *any* new roll.

yes, but you're talking about eastenders NOW. and now so am i, and i've never even seen the show!

"Seeya but wouldnt wanna be ya" Ugh!

Coming to work on the days when you wake up and think "I could just phone up and say I'm not well" Then realising you have several important things that need doing that day...

People who sniff continually. Especially sitting next to you on public transport. It seems some people don't know how to blow their noses when they have a cold.

people who don't realise that sometimes when you have a cold you don't always have a tissue. but i guess we could just let it run out of our noses.

creachy

There should be an accepted etiquette for runny nose problems. I've often sat next to a 'sniffer' and wondered if I should offer them a tissue but hesitated because the gesture might not be taken in the spirit it was intended. On the rare occasion when I find myself tissueless in public, I wish I was brave enough to ask total strangers for a tissue. Maybe we're just too British.

I offered an annoyingly sniffly neighbour on the train a paper tissue yesterday and she looked at me as if I was an alien and didn't take it. Some people don't even have colds as the sniffs sound dry but seem to be doing it out of habit.

Expert sniff detector, me.

The guy who sits in the cubicle next to me at work when he has a cold. He coughs & won't do anything about it. I bought him some Ricola and told him I hate to see people suffer.

Lack of toilets at major public events, such as the Derby or the London Marathon. I'm sure they'd start appearing in abundance if someone found they could make money at it.

People who decide to make public toilets unusable for everyone else by doing things like locking the cubicles then climbing out over the wall, peeing on the floor, breaking the seats, breaking the locks, leaving syringes and stuff all over the place, leaving dirty sanitary items all over the place (women's loos)...

"The film of the book" (except the Godfather).
People who say that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. If used intelligently, and not spoken in a voice that sounds sarcastic, it can be funny. Anyway Richard Whitely is the lowest form of wit.

People who say "ya" to mean "you".

I know it has been said already, but people who do the inverted comma thing with their hands to let people know that they are being ironic. 1 irony is supposed to be subtle 2 it is incredibly patronising 3 it is just so incredibly annoying and anyone who does it should be in some way prevented from speaking and moving their hands simultaneously.

Children's television presenters.

The ICC refusing to allow England to play Zimbabwe in South Africa.

People who talk about intelligence as though it were a bad thing.

People who talk about reading as though it were a bad thing.

People who see someone reading and say "What ya reading?". Firstly "ya" is not a word, secondly that sentence needs the word are in it, thirdly reading is something you do alone, and so do not talk to me when i an reading. Also, people who ask, after I have had the above rant, what the book is about. Read the book if you want to know. I am all in favour of spreading enjoyment of literature, but go to a library or a book shop, and read the blurbs, that is what they are for.

Year 7s (first year of secondary school, 11-12 years old). They are incredibly loud, apparently deaf to phrases such as "I am reading, leave me alone" or "I'm really in a bad mood, can you please stop trying to talk to me", and when walking around school appear to think that if they walk into someone they can walk through them - it won't work, walk around people!

Multiple exclamation marks.

Manchester United.

People who believe that playing cricket does not require high levels of fitness.

People who claim that studying maths (notice the s on the end of that word) is pointless, but who presumably use computers, CD players, cars, telephones, radios, televisions, credit cards, buildings and absolutely every other piece of ... well, everything that requires mathematical knowledge to build, use or design. Also these people very often study Latin.

People who are 'proud to be fat'. It is not an acievement.

People who oppose technology on the grounds that "we never had computers/CDs/calculators/mobile 'phones/the wheel when I was young". So? I'm young and we don't have a cure for cancer, but if someone finds one when I'm old (hopefully before) I won't object to it. Technology allows us to do things we couldn't do before, and this is frequently an improvement. Similarly, the idea that not owning things is a virtue. If the thing in question is a nuclear weapon, fair enough, but people say that they don't own computers as though this is some great achievement. Have I missed something? Does it take effort not to buy a computer? Are computers in some way evil? If I threw out my computer, would it keep returning to me (possibly on hundreds of little legs, and if you dont read Terry Pratchett, you can ignore this - oh and also, if you dont read Terry Pratchett, why the **** not?)?

People who moan to much.

PS I have had a few bad days recently and feel so much better now, so I would like to thank whoever started this thread, and also apologise 1) for the length of this posting and 2) to anyone I offended.

PPS Actually I might just apologise for missing out the people I didn't offend, it could be quicker.

I agree totally. I don't like the phrase "get a life" especially when it's used on someone who is showing an enquiring mind about something.

Furthermore (here I go!) there was a recent TV commercial for Wotsits crisps where a girl showed an enquiring mind about Wotsits and had her friends tell her to "get a life". The people who wrote this ad should be ashamed of themselves. Rant over.

Teenagers (or folk old enough to know better) using "mum jokes" on chat rooms, and resorting to name-calling.

Chewing gum on the pavement adjacent to the bin.

If you can get that close to the bin, what's so difficult about actually putting the gum IN the bin?

ARSENAL - they are french, arrogant and have a really cocky manager!

creachy

Hearing the word "nuclear" mispronounced "nucular".

Football in general, and all it stands for.

people who hate football for no reason at all and give really vague reasons like 'it's only 22 blokes trying to kick a ball into a net'. are they hurting you, i don't think so.