h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I am *so* proud - I think this is the longest thread I have ever started AND with so much moderation - shame my afternoon snooze meant I missed reading some of them before they vanished.

Well done one and all

How about, in this modern age, a computer generated presenter - voice of Simon Hoggart - face mmm not sure, morals and private life of a nun?

CH

How about Steve Wright, he could call the losers Muppets and the winners Champeens.

Maybe they could bring Max Headroom back to do it?

Brian Cant would be brilliant.

Sorry, couldn't resist this one - to the tune of "Ruby Tuesday" by the Rolling Stones:


He would never say what he had done
It don't matter now, because he's gone
Angus Deaton's through
With Have I Got News For You
Ev'ry one knows
What's up his nose

Goodbye, Angus Deayton
Boy, did they have news for you
Though your smile was such a sweet one
Still I'm gonna miss you...

Don't question why he needed to be fired
It's just that's what the BBC desired
As his name turned to mud
The tabloids scented blood
They don't let go
He had to go

Goodbye, Angus Deayton
Boy, did they have news for you
Though your smile was an effete one
Still I'm gonna miss you...

There's no time to lose, I heard him say
You know they'd already halved his pay
Because he'd been remiss
Merton took the piss
So much maligned
Ain't life unkind?

Goodbye, Angus Deayton
Boy, did they have news for you
Though your smile was a conceit(ed) one
Still I'm gonna miss you...

If we're going down that route (ie presenters of robot wars) why not Craig Charles...he always did a good job on the big breakfast of putting the days news into poetry, again like alexei sayle it would change the dynamic nicely.

Thats good, write one to the tune of 'Playaway'

I know perfect replacement:
- Anne Robinson

second choice
- Dave Gorman

third choice:
Paul Merton > new team capitain: Dave Gorman

Question:
did Paul Merton replace Angus in Room 101?
if not who else presented room 101?

Nick Hancock presented Room 101 before Paul Merton. Angus has never presented it.

Oh, thinking of guys who do stupid bets, what about Tony Hawk? Already does various radio panels and can get quite sarcastic, especially about people who think he skateboards.

> Thats good, write one to the tune of 'Playaway'
Is that the one that goes:
It doesn't matter if it's raining or it's shine
Just as long as you've got time to P-l-a-y
Playaway-way
Playawayawayaway
Playawayawayaway
Playaway

Phil

It really doesn't matter if your Angus or your Paul
Just as long as you got time to J-E-S-T J-E-S-T at the guests
The News is boring so lets make fun
And in the meantime will rewrite the Sun
So just J-E-S-T J-E-S-T with the guest.
We haven't really got any news for you-u
So Angus it's up to you
But you're G-O-N-E G-O-N-E Goneaway Goneaway Goneaway.

Phil

Thanks to those thoughts about Peter Purves, I shall never be able to watch Crufts in the same way ever again . We *need* a shudder smiley! I seem to use it all the time....

Got myself three e-mails from h2g2 today- one for getting an entry recomended, and three for getting postings remopved for libelling a***s d*****n, j**n l****e and p***r d****n, and quite possibly j*****y v*****n as well!

I think we're allowed to mention that John Leslie is facing accusations about his private life, but we're not allowed to say what they are.
Apparently Paul Merton will be filling in for tomorrow's show. I think they got it the wrong way round. Ian Hislop should be the new host, and they should pick a new team catain. It's far easier to pick a team captain who just has to be funny than to pick a host who has to keep things together, read an autocue, deliver a line that is well-prepared rather than spontaneously funny...

Cancel the programme, which is *way* past it's sell by date, and think of something new.

That'd be a *real* challenge for the BBC.

In theory, you're right, Blues Shark. However, it is _not_ past it's sell-by date and is still very funny.
It's worth pointing out that Deayton is still working for the BBC on his other projects like 'Before They Were Famous' and the New Year shows. It might be interesting to see 'The Lying Game' again, knowing what we know now!

Oh if I'm going to be subjected to bad poetry about Angus I'm off.


Incog

you'd have been subjected to a lot besides if it weren't for the mod****o** w*o kee* ****i*g p**ti*gs f*** *h* disc**si*n on the spu*ious gro**ds t**t th*y w*re libel***s and compl*t*l* untr**.

So Paul Merton did a good job at the recording last night but next week the "evil bitch woman from hell" whose name I canot bring myself to say and that is not allowed to be seen on my TV will be there instead
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/tv_and_radio/2384165.stm

WHY???

If she stays then I reckon they may as well have pulled the plug. I certainly won't watch it if she becomes the permanent host. Surely there are plenty of other people they could have chosen. Just look at this thread. Perhaps I'll send an email and point them in the direction of this conversation. Ooooh it makes me sooooo mad.