h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm beginning to rather like being a Lexical Rebus.

Come join the All H2G2 Patrick Rafter and Tennis Appreciation Club at A782057!

Yes, a blatant plug indeed...

It was my 's birthday last week. He's 9.

It means nothing to him, so I thought I'd share it with the community.

Right so does anyone know how to get cappicino out of my shirt with the stuff you'd find around the office?

The local met office think there will be two fewer typhoons here than normal this year

Did she really?

I think it would probably only work if you soak the doughnut first.
P.

What's the point in this game? It seems a bit irrelevant to me.

I'm glad you asked that. The point is one of these:

1. To produce a sequence of unrelated facts in a similar style to the game 'word disassociation'.
2. To enable the generation of a few easy paradoxes to entertain researchers and keep them off the streets.
3. A game-based means of making a wry comment on the fact that no-one seems to read anyone else's postings, or if they do, they focus on one small part and either question its veracity or criticize it out of context.

The decision, as always, is yours.

And that, I suppose, will serve me right!

I'll have the New Yorker on rye, easy on the mayo ...

"I guess my best aint good enough,
Well it aint gonna get better.
I'll bite my tongue, I've said enough,
It only brings me pressure.

"I spell out my words to the atmosphere,
To the howling dog, and the guy with a beer,
And we'll drive away from the ghosts in our head."

Astrid 2002

A volcano in the Congo has just erupted. Mt Nyamuragiga is sending columns of lava 100 metres into the air. More details on the Living Earth page...

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for bu99ery. My mother was a 15 year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy - the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really.

Lleyton Hewitt looked better before he shaved his hair off.

In my honest and dear opinion.

Is there a reason why bats hang upside down?

The conservative party has its first openly gay MP. Alan Duncan came out with the full backing of party leader Ian Duncan Smith saying he wanted to put an end to the 'Westminster tittle-tattle' going on behind his back. It's thought the 'outing' will make the Tory party "appear" more inclusive - not actually "be" more inclusive.

7. Youmust read what the referee says when he's shouting.

I can't believe it's not butter

(bloody useless space bar)

RIGHT - STOP PLAYING NOW - AND READ ON

(who said I'm becoming dictatorial?)

I started this game for reason (3):

3. A game-based means of making a wry comment on the fact that no-one seems to read anyone else's postings, or if they do, they focus on one small part and either question its veracity or criticize it out of context.

Now, talk to me. Is this a fair comment - do you sometimes think 'why do I bother posting'? Or am I just being a complete whingebag?

Cabin crew, doors to manual.