h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yea! Mk2 and I went through some really hard and difficult times, that would have split other couples up! We wont through a lot of turmoil and financial difficulties as well as family troubles, yet we are still here,and what I cant get used to, is that we went through all that, only to have our happiness cut short when she was diagnosed with emphysema
That and all the crap I was put through by last employers, and the way my so called "settlement of the legal case" went, along with the other things, has proved to be too much for to take. The nightmares that I get with this PTSD they say I have, is also beginning to drag me down, I try really hard to beat all this, but at times its really hard going
Smudger.

It sounds a rough time Smudger!
Can you talk to your councellor about your nightmares?

Hi SS, yea! she has tried to get me to bring them up, but I don't think she would believe them? Its really weird though as even sound or a smell can bring them back. I just say that they are in the delete file of the hard drive, waiting for more space to be required.
Think I have got enough problems to be sorted out, so I can get back to behaving like a normal person again
Smudger.

Smudger,

I am sure she will believe them. if she is experienced she will have heard of far weirder nightmares than yours I am sure.

Are they re-enactments of past experiences or just seriously weird?

Websailor

She would believe your nightmares, possibly they are a small part of the key to solving your other problems. It isn't easy to cover such difficult areas but you might have a sense of a relief if you do.....

They are passed events from way back to my Navy days, and more recent ones from my time offshore and my ambulance service days. Just want to leave them where they are, too much pain to bring them out in the open again
Smudger.

Oh, Smudger, I have heard that before. At least they are 'real' nightmares not crazy ones, though I suppose that makes it harder to dismiss them.

Websailor

Mind you, I don't get a lot of time to dwell on such things as looking after Mk2 takes up most of my time, well apart from what I call my surfing time
Smudger.

Hi Smudger I'm jutimskip, nice to meet you (virtually)
I know some anti-depressants can cause outrageous nightmares??

Hi SS & Web Sailor, my computer's out of storage and I am connected again.
I'll catch up and join in

Hi Jutimskip, antidepressants can and do causes nightmare, mine can and does also give me halucinations when going into or out of sleep!.
Believe it or not I see parts of the furniture stretching towards me like rubber and jackets hanging up appear more like human beings!
I get it more or less constantly but for me it is a balnce between what can be REALLY scarey hallucinations or bad depression.
I know I could try other depressants but better the devil you know, and all that months of trying to see if they work or not!
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I have just been to docs again and asked if mental health team had replied to fax asking for an urgent appointment for me to see someone, but doc said they can take ages and to ring in a weeks time ans say I am concerned about delay, if they haven't replied by then of course.
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I was cleaning my flat yesterday and although that is good I noticed at one point I was getting agitated about it having to be spotlessly clean and realised I was heading into OCD territory so stopped and said to myself I can only carry on if not too obsessive about it being spotless. I calmed and indeed carried on to do kitchen too but in a more normal state of mind.
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I had a bought of a little too obsessively cleaning kitchen sink a month ago so am watching for signs and avoiding that as I am in such an aggitated state of mind at moment it would be easy to head in the OCD direction if not careful!

Yea! I sometimes think I see things out of the corner of my eye, yet when I look there is nothing there, but apart from that I don't have any other side effects. The nightmares I get are from real events that happened way back in my past, they just come back to life again, in my dreams that is.
Smudger.

It must be hard getting flashback nightmares. Are they true to life or do they get garbled in your nightmares?

Websailor

Smudger, I sometimes get the corner of eye thing too where I think something is there but isn't.
If I get a quick glance of something out of corner of eye it sometimes looks a little differant to what it really is, if I look at it straight on it is of course normal!
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I know you said you don't want to talk about bad things from your past to therapist but is talking about them and thus helping to lessen their impact really worse than living with thoughts in your mind that harm you?
A year ago roughly I had told no one about my depression, not even my bestest friend who thought I was just grumpy, then I wrote my un-edited guide entry on depression and started to talk about it on here. At one point I thought I would delete guide entry to cover it up again but didn't, and thank God I didn't as talkijng about it on here has helped me, and others too.
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Eventually due to not seeking help and not talking to others off here, the depression caused more and more jumpiness in me and eventually panic attacks, which were EXACTLY like asthma attacks!

Smudger you have obviously lived through and seen some terrible things, but you're here, you've survived So try and remind yourself how strong you have already been and you wil survive this period, and hopefully the nightmares will re alise there's no beating you

Yes WS, they are true life ones, in fact its just like reliving them all over again
I have read all your posts with great interest, and had no idea that so many people suffered from the same thing, thanks again for all your support I feel better already just by sharing it
Smudger,

Smudger, that is the good thing about h2g2 and this thread in particular as there are others with similar experiences who can help out or even be supportive by simply listening via this thread for example. I like this thread as no one bothers you and can say whatever you like.

Glad to be of use, and I like this thread too. Invisible illnesses so often get overlooked and it is good to talk, as an advert used to say I really do believe it helps, though it can be very, very difficult.

Websailor

Eek!
I am going to see a shrink for first time ever tomorrow morning! I am not sure exactly which type of head doctor it will be but am getting my bumps felt anyway so am going in my best tatty hippy revival clothes and beads, just incase they think I'm NOT crazy,lol.
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I go with an open mind so will see what happens when get there, I just hope I don't have to look at those cards with ink stains and say what I see.

Good luck! Hope the appointment goes well. My shrink is very nice, may yours be too.

Hi SS, how did your appointment go?
Hope it was of some benefit to you, and hope you're okay? (I know you can initially feel a great sense of relief, but it can be quite draining)

Take Care
jutimskip