h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

>> ...~jwf~ will be along soon with a plausible(?) explanation of why "sparrow's fart" means "too effing early. <<

The 'soon' bit I can validate, it being a mere 20 minutes since your posting. But...

Truth is I had no idea it meant 'early'. And would have taken it as a British variant on the North American habit of referring to the feces or genitalia of small animals when making a point that something is small, without great value, meaningless or insignifcant.

"Not worth a pinch of 'coon s**t."
"I don't give a rat's a** about that."

It is a well known fact that the British love their birds in a way that is similar to America's love affair with rodents and other furry mammals of various sizes. Perhaps we should ask a Brit to explain why the gaseous excretions from a sparrow's anus would have anything to do with complaining about prematurities. 'Tis said the early bird doth get the worm and I know from experience that light sleepers often cannot lie abed thru the morning chorus of our winged friends.

Neckst.
~jwf~

I use the term sparrow fart for cock crow... I nearly used it here, but I wasn't sure it would be okay...

I guess the sparrow's fart would be the thing the sparrow does after waking and before getting up, having its morning coffee and breaking into the dawn chorus.

I was always amused by the phrase 'a gnat's cock' to describe a very small distance - usually used by workmen measuring things. "You're a gnat's cock out here John!"

Gnat's cock, that's new to me... Good!

Weak tea = gnat's piss

<>
My Dad used to use that expression to mean week beer...

I'd assumed that 'sparrow's fart' was simply a coarsened reference to more poetic ways of describing the dawn chorus, substituting a common bird and a less romantic biological sound.

I'd have thought that the most common gnat reference was in the phrase referring to misers - 'as tight as a gnat's chuff'.

Chuff?
What's that when it's at home?

~jwf~

bits left over after thrashing and flaying

Chaff?

'chuff' isn't specific, but refers to lower orifices.
Presumably with gnats, the lack of specificity isn't a problem.

>> 'chuff' isn't specific, but refers to lower orifices. <<

If this is true then I will need to reform my idea of what is meant by "chuffed."

I thought it meant happy with a situation or pleased by an outcome.

How then do the lower orif...
I dare not speculate further.

The verb chuff and the noun chuff seem to be different.
Hopefully someone can set us right here.

~jwf~

'Chuffed' meaning the state of being pleased is fine.
However, 'chuff' can also be used as a verb meaning 'to break wind' - maybe there's some kind of connection with chuff-chuff being a childish word for steam locomotive?

Marrow - being a mate is still used in parts of the north. I have a friend who when looking for the accompanying sock to the one he has managed to find in the clean washing shouting "I canny find the marrer to this one!"

From an expatriate Brit living in the Antipodes (where did THAT term come from?) and being friends with a (pre-Mugabbwe) Rhodesian, I say 'sparrow's fart' means the same as " crack of dawn" (origins please?).

Antipodes: feet in the opposite direction. Ex-Pat: one who has renounced his Irish nationality Crack of dawn: Break of day?

Antipodes - The poetry written by an emmet to it's Internet Provider.

Apparently "Antipodes" was pronounced with three syllables at first: Aunty Poads.

People showing off their familiarity with Latin were responsible for making it four: Aunt Ippody's.

Antipodes - Protest movement started by thrash metal enthusiasts who, deafened by the volume of their favourite music, misheard the name of an Irish influenced music group.

Erm - it's "gnats chuft". More likely to be found in the "profanisaurus" than in any dictionary.

Not related to chuffed, you'll be tickled pink to know.