h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Wowwwwwww, I can't believe this thread is still going! Thanks for keeping it alive you guys XD

it's slowing down in silliness though


I'm waiting for a spaghetti revival come back!

1. Do your teddies talk to you at night?
My teddies not only talk to me but they have committee meetings in the middle of the night discussing one item, their annual teddy bears picnics. It takes nearly all year for the teddy bears to agree on where they will have the picnic as they are always arguing with themselves. They also get very and have lots of fights about who is going to head the nightly committee meeeting.
2. Whenever you go into a field of sheep , do you feel the need to hug them, squeeze them, and call them George?
When I see them, all I want to do is either run away or start laughing . I have wanted to stroke them but not squeeze them. Sometimes I want to cuddle them. I do not call them George but Rab as they are Scottish sheep. The sheep I know are very fond of changing lightbulbs and chasing across the road trying to sell them double glazing.
3. Is your blankey out to get you?
My blankey who is very , is out to get me and chases me with official forms to fill in as well as talking in triple dutch about why did the cross the road.
4. Do you believe that Bill Gates is an alien from outer space and has brainwashed everyone into believing his products are actually good?
Bill Gates is an and he has put something in the water supply to make everyone believe his products are good. He is not just an but his a cyborg that tells dreadful jokes but they are all in technobabble.
5. Have you ever seen a giant floating banana?
I have seen a giant floating banana on television today and quite often when I wait for the bus. Sometimes the giant floating banana starts to talk to me. Some of my neighbours are giant floating bananas.
6. Do you enjoy playing with firearms? And if you’ve never used one, do you enjoy playing with imaginary firearms?
Yes I have played with firearms and I have also dreamt about them and they all turn into giant floating bananas that chase me whlst they are throwing custard pies at me and they are all dressed in tutu's.
7. Do you believe squirrels will overthrow power and rule the world?
Squirrels are members of a radical organisation who want to overthrow the world by taking all the nuts for themselves. Then they will organise raids on sweet factories and all places that produce nuts. They will also become very nutty in the process.
8. Have you ever thought pea soup was something you did in the bathroom?
Pea soup is a new beauty product and it does everything from being a cure of baldness, anti wrinkle cream, it makes 30 years younger and it reduces fat. I used when I want to have a bath. I am going to grow pea soup in my garden.
9. Have you ever put your underwear over your pants?
Yes I have dones this several times. I have also managed to put two legs into leg. I sometimes put them over my head to use as a hat.

And finally…

10. Do you believe you’re sane?
I will have to ask my teddys if they think I am sane but they are busy having a fight now and I have been drinking alot and they are stoned out of their minds with booze and are very .

There is a town where there is spahetti grows on trees. The spaghetti is protected by a spaghetti that breathes spaghetti fire. The squirrels nearby have stopped collecting nuts but now collect spafhetti, . The squirrels have a school on how to eat spaghetti and are all dressed like the Fonz. They have fights with the local mafia owls and rhey get on .

http://news.bbc.co.uk/onthisday/hi/dates/stories/april/1/newsid_2819000/2819261.stm
proof of the spaghetti, is in the pasta

The Flying Pink Spaghetti Monster has stretched its noodles it way at boring board meetings, exciting executives into nattering to themselves and jumping out of windows shouting "Gerinom Liley The Pink" whilst dressed as sugar plum fairies and holding a wand in their hands

I remember a similar story in the 70's.

Was that posts?

The teddy bears are rounding up that are straying onto Thurrock's buses. The are hijacking the buses and driving them to the Wild West of Essex then lassoing traffic cones on their way. The teddy bears are having problems rounding up the as they are so fast as they are all wearing roller skates.

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=9644

DO NOT TOUCH!

You can touch, but the consequences are entirely your own responsibility

wish I'd have thought of it

BUT!

A22202272

ref 5231 I've been told I'm "a bit touched" Does that count?

is that a bit "tout" or "ched" or even "utch" ??

I'm a bit touched now - can't ruddy spell

Eeeee, by eck, thou's in order lad.

it's withdrawal symptoms run out 2 week ago and need Irish lottery win - to re-stock

Fluggerlumppheticburrhic, finally found the key to the drinks cabinate, *parp* whoops I'm off

some folk have all the luck


it's hard to pretend that dilute blackcurrant is a