h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ahem.... I've been told by my mate Phil, peering over my shoulder, that he wants to write something regarding the spelling of Guinness a good few posts ago... over to you Phil...


Guiness as you spell it is incorrect adn should be banned as you should spell it like this GUINNESS. PLease be a wareof this fact please for give the typoes as i am drunk love t5o all you idiots who drink the black nectar by the way my girlfirend think u thaty it is better in BOTTLES

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Well, there you have it, straight from the Irishman/Jamaican(ish)'s mouth.

Magic.

I think we've already handled the speeling thing, especially as most mistakes are generally typos and not spelling mistakes, because we are all too drunk to see the keys. Thank you and goodnight
hxx

Spelling, not speeling. Pissed again...

I have to admit that I usually can be found at the local bar tipping back several pints of Budweiser on just about any given day of the week. But for some odd reason I made the sad mistake of wanting to try something new just a couple of nights ago. I discovered the new phenomena known as Tequiza (which, by the way, should be pronounced Tequeezy)

If you're not familiar with it, the drink is supposed to encorporate the tastes of lime, tequila and Mexican beer (cerveza). I am sad to say that it doesn't do such a great job of it. The only flavor that I was able to discern was that of the lime. I am sadder to say that I actually enjoyed it. I am absolutely forlorn to say that the night in question happened to be the night of a first date with a fine young woman I recently met.

And, might I add, "fine young woman" barely touches the tip of the iceburg when describing her (to say that she handled the situation well is an understatement). After downing, oh, about 20 bottles of said stuff (they do gown down easily enough) and one shot of some sludge-like substance that was described to me as a "Duck Fart", I became just a litle bit drunk with even less of an ability to walk.

Needless to say, I was given a ride home with somewhere in the area of nine stops for me to vomit on the side of the road. And, amazingly enough, we have plans to go out again this weekend!

So, in conclusion, my hat's off to Denise who made the best of a bad situation. And for those of you out there who have yet to try Tequiza and are thinking of doig so sometime in the future, do take it slow and be sure that its not on the night of a first date. You may not be as lucky as I was. Enjoy.

I have to agree. Although you probably wouldnt agree with my taste in beer. I prefer piss water Budweiser. But to me, Guiness tastes like a liquid form of Fruit Loops. I've tried it, and simply could not stop thinking of Sam the Toucan. If you ask me, beer should not do that to a person. Ah, well. Call me strange if you like.

I once got into a fight in highschool (USA term) because I was the (one and only) defender of Freddy Mercury's heterosexuality...Oh how could one be so wrong?!?

Oddly even more interesting... Why would you feel the need to defend?

The need for solids during a Guinness fest is totally unnecessary as the wonderful Black has the properties of a king's banquet hence no need for silly time wasting. The fact that you invaded a secure Irish stomach with the spices from a distant land serve's you right, the ensueing battle must have been similar to a drunken night out with Ghengis Ghan ...
The only gauge for a good night out on the Black totally hinges on the grey scale of the faeces the morning after .. the blacker the better the night ..

Beer comes in many forms and has many names and (so some people tell me) many difdferent tastes, they all, however, have one thing in common, they come out the same colour as they went in changing the user somtimes drastically

My partner is continually telling me of his love for Beer.

Initially thinking this was a form of teenage adulation that had yet to pass, I have since determined that it is in fact, a love, actually I would go so far as to say as almost an obsession.

Although difficult to, I imagine that this is a common theme esp. when interelated to Sports on the TV). Does nayone agree?

I wont even start on the Vindaloo Curry !

This seems vaguely familiar-you werent a member of CXH Country Club were you?

Half guiness, half champagne. Delicious, and if you must "waste" champage, much better than that acidic Bucks Fiz crap.

I don't consider this a great acheivement necessarily but it is a lot of beer. I spent 14 hours in a Boston Pub and drank 32 pints of Guinness. To say I love the beer would be understatement at best!

i just want to offer up my support to the beer cause... !!! i am having a few this evening as well.. wonderful stuff i tell you

Beer is a hybrid drink, coming in two categories, and various flavours within each category. It is an alcoholic*1 drink served in Public Houses, and other liscenced premises and consists of either Ale or Lager, liberally mixed with water, and served in any glass you like, as long as it is not clean. Ideally, gasses should be involved in the pouring process, to further dilute the mixture, and form what is commonly known as the "head"tm.

There are many strange customs surrounding the drinking of beer, the most common of which is to talk succesively louder, and less coherently with each pint*2 consumed. Other customs include, but are not limited to, dancing on tables, and singing karaoke*3.


1 Alcohol. An amusing liquid whos strange properties delude imbibers with the surety that they are invulnerable, funny, and irresistable to the opposite sex.
2 Pint. An outlawed measure in Europe, which none the less is ignored by the general population of alcoholic vendors with some success.
3 Karaoke. An Oriental form of self punishment. The willing subjects have to follow a bouncing ball as it traces the lyrics for a song, the backing tune to which is being played for all to hear. Subjects must attempt to match these words to the rhythm played, and produce something that in no way matches what has been previously released by the performing artist credited with the song.

While working full-time in an Irish pub in Southampton a few years ago, I helped serve approximately half a barrel of Guinness to one particular gentleman throughout the course of a day and an evening.

Half a barrel translates roughly to 44 pints. But what is remarkable here, is that the day in question, was the 18th March, the day AFTER Saint Patrick's Day.

Our thirsty friend was dealing with the after-effects of the celebrations the night before.

Rarely have I witnessed such a remedy. Dazed and bewildered, I thought to myself, if that's the hair, then just how big was the dog?

The game is called SPOOF. I am not very good at it as I keep on losing and getting drunk.

He He He

And what vintage was the Yak`s Urine? The `79 was a good year but the `86 would probably shade it.! Lovely colour too! Quelle ambience! Cat`s urine cat only be defined as inferior piss..no palette here!