h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

* looks worriedly at the President *

Why? Have I turned into a frog again?

Maybe he means the American President/s? He never specified it was you...

And 'president' Bush certainly has the potential to turn into a frog. I can just see the political satire now...

Honestly the entire Bush/Gore campaign sounds like America is trying to decided whether to watch a good porn, or an action/horror flick...

I've got a large bomb somewhere around here. What say we drop it on the White House? It looks too much like the Alabaster House anyway. A bit of soot might liven it up a bit.

No, that's a bad idea...far too extreme. We could protest outside and hold up the traffic...
*looks annoyed*
Oh wait no, we're students we get no news coverage they just warn people the traffics bad and to avoid that area without actually mentioning tuition fees at all...
*stomps*
We could throw pie though

You gotta wait till the incumbent is actually 'incumbed' in the House. That way, you get rid of 2 problems at once... even better if you get them both in there at the same time... then of course, you've got the Nader factor... but who's gonna listen to anything he has to say anyway!

Drop a large asteroid on it from a height of several hundred thousand miles?

hey tink - are you by any chance from York University??!

I just ask because here I am, sitting at home during the middle of midterms because the union that includes my TAs, RAs and GAs (teaching assisstants, Research Assisstants, Graduate Assisstants) is on strike, picketing the university entrances. It's been going on for weeks, and neither the University nor the Union seems close to relenting. And NOBODY knows about it. Any news coverage is in editorial form, in the back pages of the Toronto Star!

Oh lovely.

I just got awakened by the delightful sound of the fire alarm so the entire Hall traipsed out and spent some time standing in the car park getting cold. People are going to die if they're discovered to be responsible. This I vow.

That sounds familar. In our halls, by university law, there had to be one fire alarm drill every term. Unfortunately the porters have never had a chance to prepare the drill, because the students have set it off at least once a term anyway.

I think this one might have been a student's work because all the tutors were milling about looking confused and if it's a drill they're always well-prepared in advance. It's very, very quiet this morning for some reason... no doubt there'll soon be a sign up in the entrance if it was caused by a student. No doubt with a deduction from the communal damage deposit if they don't know who set it off.

At Lyddon Hall in my first year, the "unplanned" ones were better, as they tended to happen during the day or evening when hardly anyone was there anyway, whereas the planned ones were at approximately "far too bloody early" in the morning.

It wasn't always students, though. Once the detector that had been set off was right where the cleaners were polishing, though they said it couldn't possibly have been set off by the polish, because the polish didn't set alarms off. Hmmm.

One of our tutors (mine, actually) set it off by burning some toast one morning. The only drill we've had was at 7:30 in the morning. I'd woken up about twenty seconds beforehand.

Still no information has been provided as to the cause of this morning's shenanigens.

Ahhh the residence fire alarm... I remember a scant month ago when I first experienced the drone of a million million bees in my head, telling me as one that if I didn't get out of my suite they were all going to sting me at once... i barely escaped with my sanity. And it went off again a couple of days ago - luckily, I was already outside!

Well apparently it was set off deliberately - at least, one of the "break glass here" thingys was broken. Nobody's owned up, and the Hall Warden is very unhappy because he got woken up as well, and because the other day the TV projector in the bar got damaged by some idiots who are also currently anonymous. He wants information. I don't blame him. Shame I don't know anything. My hands feel like they want to close around someone's neck right about now...

*recalls her track record and backs away from MaW nervously*

* doesn't notice. The person he's looking for lives in Newark Hall *

*wondering about Tinkerbell's track record and resisting the urge to comment on the degredation of her innocent fairy image*

The great thing about the alarms is when you get so used to them that you ignore them entirely; in my second year at James Baillie in Leeds, I once came back to find the fire alarm going off, so I stood outside to find that no-one else joined me, despite the fact that there were three people in in my flat alone.

*wonders how her fairy image could possibly be further degraded from that comment when she just meant her track record of being blamed for everything*

Ummm...wouldn't sleeping through fire alarms count as a bad thing in general?