h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Peregrin -

thanks very much for the idea... as soon as I get around to actually building the Embassy, it'll be very helpful. I'm waiting for the Post to get back online... hoping maybe my ad will bring people flocking to help. I'm DEFINITELY going to need employees, almost as bad as YOU seem to need secretaries!

I would like to apply to be the H2G2 Ambassador to (surprise) Earth. A rather mundane little place, I know, but for some reason I seem to have grown fond of it...

And after all, you can't have an embassy without an ambassador!

K
~8~

Okay! Ambassador to Earth it is
Er... as long as you let us keep the Alabaster House on your territory... :-p

Good to have you on board! You don't need to actually do anything - in fact the Ministry of Doing Sod All seems to be the most popular section of our government at the moment!

The Ministry of Wisdom Linux & Toothbrushes will be the most architecturally impressive once I've finished designing it.

But the ministry of jelly will be the most popular if I stop eating our free gifts long enough to promote it

Of course, your highn--euhhh, right honourab--ahhh, Mr. President. (jeez, it's hard being from Canada and having a Prez!)

I wouldn't dream of denying the Alabaster House a prominent place in the Embassy!

Good.

* surreptiously puts the penguin catapult and toothbrush crossbow away again *

*holds out her hands towards MaW and the penguin*
Pingu!
*bounces up and down grinning*
Pingu!

*pats Tinkerbell on the head*

These ministries are coming along nicely. I'm off to find some jelly

Oh and Kumetanzuka I'm British and so equally unused to having a president, let alone being one... But you're all welcome to treat me like royalty if you like

*wonders why she's being patted on the head*
PINGU!
*looks hopefully at MaW*

Royalty...hmmm...
*grins eveily*
You sure about that Peregrin?

Well... on second thoughts, don't treat me like people treat the British royalty! I could do without tomatoes being thrown at me head.

*feeds a fruit pastille to Pingu*

*throws a Fruit pastille at Peregrins head in an attempt to start the royal treatment*
I want Pingu!
*sticks a picture of Pingu Penguin on the wall*

*eats the fruit pastille* Hey now that's more like it!

*looks annoyed*
That was supposed to convince you to use your presedential powers to fetch me a cuddly Pingu

This isn't Pingu. It's Tux. Look.

* holds out Tux *

*Waves his presidential all-purpose wand and a cuddly fluffy Pingu appears*

Hang on, you're a fairy, why can't you do this?

*stamps foot*
Pingu!

*realises that simulpost makes her look very ungrateful*
Thankyou Peregrin
*runs over to cuddle Pingu*


Fairies can only use magic to help other people unless it's an emergency...I don't think Pingu's count

* puts Tux away again *

* takes out the Rod of Wisdom and waves it around. Nothing happens. *

Hmm. Batteries must be flat.

I'm feeling a little left out when everyone I know seems to be minister for something or other, so I thought I'd like to be Ambassador to the Clanger planet.

That's not a great job application actually, I'll try again:

I feel that the Clangers are more likely to trust a fellow stop-motion animation, after all, you only have to look at old Godzilla movies to see what happens when a previously isolated stop-motion animation is contacted. Not that I'm suggesting the Clangers are likely to start tearing up cities, but they might stop us from sharing in the soup dragon's produce or something.

Okay, sounds good

Would you like your title to be 'Ambassador to the Clanger Planet' or 'Ambassador to the Clangers'?