h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What did Pan do with last year's decorations?

Maybe its time for a new tree.... I'll see if I can find one

Please try to find one with roots on so we can recycle it for next year's celebrations 2legs!

*Rummages unsuccessfully behind the bar and decides that there's nowt for it but to brave the depths of the cellar in search of the decorations*

Wish me luck!I might be some time...

*Lifts the heavy and creaking cellar door and a rush of dank air greets her*

Where's the light switch?

Seasonal Fred? Wasn't he the barman who ran off with the bustry blonde?

Whispers from afar - the light switch is at the bottom of the stairs

Btw - drank my Bushmills & replaced it with my usual - so, unless there's too much talk of Ch*****as, I shall remain calm, & collected

new thread, new for the

wait, that's not right. should not be new, but aged

::replaces fresh with 16 year old australian shiraz he tested thoroughly this weekend ::

Yipee! The Beaujolais Nouveau has penetrated to my corner of Massachusetts....yummy!

Have another saucer - its ripe and fruity!! (just like me, really)

I've got a bottle of Victoria Merlot that I won in a rugby bet - bin saving it for an occasion of note...?
Thank you - POP!

Better chill it a bit - pop it in the fridge awhile...African heat is hell on redwine...

I thought Pan used last year's Christmas decorations to adorn Antonios' appendages...?

*reenters dragging a large errr, can I have a hand with this? its the smallest they had... its only 20 Ft tall but its got a great root stock on it... anyone got a large bucket or wooden barrel we can put it in?

Hey, 2legs! You're attempting re-entry with a 20ft festive pine tree? Good grief! You'll burn up worse than SkyLab!

- really surprised there's any left! What a true gent

dsl - you have just GOT to meet Pan

WR - you couldn't hang on to it till towards the end of January could you?
Didn't Antonio return the decs? If not: shame on him - don't let him near again

2legs - I can lend a paw ... ice bucket too small? just how much headroom is in the place anyway - maybe you could stick it in sideways - maybe put it in the ice bucket first?

Are there any fire extinguishers in this place - just in case

sipping 16 year old Australian Shiraz in a very gentile manner

Dearest Shirps,

dsl is it? I'll have you know that I'm running on lovely SRX wifi network (the very latest generation - circa x8 faster than 8011g!) via a Motorola cable modem - just dl is fine, really..........

Pan sounds an interesting chap.....he doesn't have a hair problem in the leg region, does he?

I DO apologise - dl it is then

shan't say anymore about a certain person - just wait till you meet Pan

who said I was setting a trap?

20 ft ? no wonder this site keeps crashing all the time. there must be tons of gigabytes in festive timber like that

pan has hair problems in the leg region? i never noticed

*Inspects the tree*

We'll need more tinsel ... more lights ... and a block & tackle to get it upright.

it isn't upright yet

so that's why some of the branches caught fire when i lit up the first lights

... enters with a chainsaw ... did someone say the tree might be too big?

found a bit of Gwennie's brownie in my bag - still good

...*the sound of a fire truck in the alley has everyone checking the tree, Pierce's peg leg and such when Pandora enters, shirt inside out & front to back, blowing kisses & waving at a truck load of nice young fire men...*



A Christmas tree!!!!
This'll be the first time in, like, forever that *I* haven't had to go out & get one!

Shirps! ...*whispers...*got your "envelope" wonder what's inside?
...*pats & tips her 'flask-o-fire' into Shirp's bowl...*

Gwennie!
Derby!
WR!
Kes!Where's mari??
TWO LEGS!!!!
Pierce!
Oh How I've missed you all!!!! ...*goes around to cuddle with anyone she didn't see when she first entered...*

...*hits the juke box with her hip...the music plays...*...you say it's your birthday - du-dun-da-dun-da-dun da dun-

TWENTYNINEANDHOLDING!

Pan! Where have you been? Wraps paws & front legs round her & gives a big ... licks her hands & runs to get her ball & ring for Pan to play with

for the "drink" - that'll warm me up.

Just keep that one for the 9th - - nowt special though!

wagging tail & waiting for Pan to throw the ball&ring

PAN!

Did I ever tell you that you are the prettiest thing, bar none?

Wow! The Panster is in the house! My, what a suspiciously delightful way of wearing a skirt......(Thinks...I must check for exhausted young firemen in the back alley).

Now! Where did I put that HUGE bunch of ?

Have a LARGE Bushmills, sweeting..........