h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The first thing anyone notices when entering the ladies is the giant wall-sized mirror along one wall, plus the sofa where women who are in the ladies just to support their friends can go and brush up, relax and chat whilst looking at their reflections in the mirror.
The latest in germ-free handbag shelves and make-up holders has also been installed.

Could you help me over to the couch? I don't have any legs.

Certainly.
*Helps Humaficsh over to the couch, and seats him down somewhere comfortable*
How's that? Hmm.... Perhaps I should get a commode or two in here - after finding out how to spell "commode"

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Ahh, thank you. That's much better. But I believe this is a Ladies Room(?) making it inappropriate for me to be a "him", which I'm not. Did you get that? Anyway, I think there are already commodes, since I think I used one to get here.

*Yet again, Bluebottle has said "him" when he should have said "her" *
I apologise most sincerely for any and all confusion I inadvertantly caused. But typically, both men and women have seemed to use both toilets, normally using the excuse that the other was closed for cleaning - which it can't be as I can never get around to it...

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Humaficsh accepts Bluebottle's apologies and agrees that with many life-forms it is extremely difficult to determine gender. She also adds that the only possible way one can get around to cleaning a toilet is if they have nothing else to do. *Humaficsh ponders why there is a c in her name*

Yes, why is there a C in your name?
Is it because fish swim in the sea, and so you'd decided to put the c in the fish?

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By Neptune's triton, I think that's it! Maybe that's how I can breathe out of water. Thanks for clearing that up, I guess I shouldn't ditch the c after all .

I certainly wouldn't, it does, afterall, leave your name that certain uniqueness...
Admittedly it's confusing as to how to spell, but it is definately a unique, noteworthy name.

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As is yours; and I'm sorry about Mr. Secombe, although I could use some information reguarding his identity, if you don't mind.

You can find out about him here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A206399
He was one of the Goons in the Goon show, playing Neddie Seagoon.

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Ahhh... so THAT'S where your name came from. Muy bueno. Hmmm, I wonder if I can still move after I've been in this "comfortable spot" for two months. Maybe I just need some . YUMMY!

If you need help moving about, I can give you a lift.

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Thanks, but I think I can still move. A massage would be nice, though. *Rings little bell.* Ralph, could you help me over to the massage table? God, I LOVE the Ladies Room!!

Ralph?!?!?!?

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I know; "What a weird name for a deaf and blind massuse."

If he is deaf and blind, how did he know you rang a bell?

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*floating in, first visit - I think... not sure until all the conversations have been updated*

The toilets have been around for a while, but all the old conversations have yet to return.
Still, welcome to the toilets. Would you like a guided tour, or some privacy?
Don't mind me, I'm just mopping the floor...

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Oh, I'd LOVE a guided tour!