h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I know where you work. Only one company is stupid enuff to attempt this.

In response to REM's post... Anyone who would do anything as patently silly as run on a computer should be committed, not shot.

Unless of course he's just making a political statement against them, in which case, provided his argument is a good one, I'm all for it.

But on the whole, I like computers very much and I don't think they're the sort of thing that deserve to be trampled, even by programmers, for whom I have, if not any particular affection, a great deal of respect. Because programming involves a lot of numbers and errors and arbitrary commands and sitting alone in front of a terminal for hours on end thinking about things. Very small things, like the number three in relation to the variable Z, a character chosen from string P, and so on, and it's really very hard.

I don't mean to defend programmers. Perhaps they should be shot. I don't know. I'm just saying that in my experience, programming is a very difficult thing to get the hang of, and in all probability not much more fun to do for a living than, say, working in a rice paddy.

You don't even get a tan.

Errrr. I think you missed the point, very informative and entertaining though your response was.

He said PROGRAMMES not PROGRAMMERS. This is the non-US spelling of PROGRAM (the Americans like to simplify things you know). However, "Program" seems to have moved into common usage in the UK despite initial resistance, as does "disk" (as opposed to "disc"). We still insist on inserting a "U" in color though despite the fact that all our word processors are intent on putting squiggly red lines under it every time we do so.

Ah. Yes, I caught that on the second time through, but there was nothing I could do about it by that time other than wait and see if anyone would notice.

Sorry about that.

Most word processors distributed by Microsoft have the option to change the language for the spell checker to use, if the dictionary is "available," and on my computer "English (United Kingdom)" is not. It goes back to United States all on its own. It seems odd that it wouldn't be available on yours, either, considering.

You know, I bet there are no other dictionaries. I bet they just put that option in to make us think it was fascinatingly hi-tech and things like that.

Point taken. It seems to me that MS Word takes every oportunity to revert to US spelling though.

Incidentally, if you have MS Word (any version), try typing "chapatti" (Indian food) and see what the suggested spellings are.

Now try and tell me that computers and Microsoft in particular aren't at least the product of a warped mind.,..

I love it!

But I simply have to ask.

What made you type that? Perhaps it's another geographical thing, but I've never found occasion to use that word in any sort of document, and probably I won't in the future even though I know what it means now. Well, not in a document that contains more than the single word, so I can show it to people and make them laugh at Microsoft. Anyway, seems odd.

It's clear that you don't type restaurant menus for a living, particularly for Indian Resaurants.

Damn, and I'd done so well concealing that facet of my personality up till now.

Ah, well, better luck next time, and back into the Identity Bucket I delve... who will I be tomorrow... hmmmmm...

To answer your previous question... I read about the Chapatti / Teapot thing in a magazine (sorry to be so boring). Talking of boring, have you ever looked "boring" up in the yellow pages? Some (but sadly not all) say "Boring - See Civil Engineers". I used to have a Civil Engineer friend who didn't find that at all funny.

bye...

IT is CRAP.

But then, when you're earning megabucks, maybe you can't expect or deserve to have fun earning them.

Indeed - and a "Font" would be what? I have this menu item on a number of my programmes but have yet to wash a baby's head in a religious ceremony.

Apparently, on one version of Microsoft Word (can't remember which) if you set the language to 'English (United States)', typed in 'I'd like to see Bill Gates dead', highlighted the lot and put it through the thesaurus, it would come back with 'I'll drink to that'