h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It's prediction time!

This is a thread for making predictions for 2016. What's gonna go down in 2016? Make your predictions here. They can be sensible or silly - you can predict with a frown, or predict with a chuckle.

They can be about any subject - sports, politics, religion, current affairs, whatever.

Go!

I predict peace, and an end to violence. haa. only kidding. I predict more war death and distruction mainly caused yet again by the 'west' asserting its protecting the world from 'terror'. I also predict a UK housing crash towards the end of the year perhaps, or at least the inklings of the start of one getting going...

Louis Van Gaal moves on from Manchester Utd.

Leicester City don't live up to their early form and slip down the table.

A rock is spotted on Mars that looks like something else.

Another rock is spotted on Mars that looks like something else.

On closer examination from a different angle both anomalies turn out to be...rocks.

Life is found on another planet, but they live under water, are blobby, and not very intelligent.

A prequel to Star Wars, The Force Awakens, is announced. It's titled Star Wars, The Force Is Asleep.

A prominent politician falls asleep during a debate in the commons.

The Pound Shop changes its name to "The One Pound Fifty Shop" and everything costs £1.50

An influx of massive spiders in the UK. Australian visitors say, "Where's the massive spiders?"

Heated debate on whether they should legalise something that's illegal.

Wayne Rooney's performances at the Euros cause people to say, "How is this guy England's top scorer ever?!"

England don't get out of their group at the Euros. Roy Hodgson says, "Oops!" throws in something philosophical a great thinker once said many years ago, and promptly resigns.

Someone climbs over the fence at Buckingham Palace. A soldier runs out with a machine gun and they climb back.

A new element is discovered and named after Carol Vorderman.

A joint - presumably smoked by one of The Beatles - is found in the Queen's toilet and sells for a million at auction.

Team GB finishes 8th in the medal table at the Olympics.

Zsa Zsa is no more.

A type of tiger becomes extinct.

Those are hilarious.

But if there's a joint in the Queen's bathroom, isn't the simplest explanation going to be that She smoked it, or was about to?

That prequel to "Star Wars" will be called "The Force puts audiences to sleep."

It makes more sense to legalise something illegal than something that's already legal, or am I missing something here?

Two convos on the same topic seems like overkill.

Isn't the other conversation about predilections and people are just misunderstanding / misreading / wilfully ignoring the fact?

Deb

Misreading is ether an art form or a rat from. Take your pick. Or a rat morf.

I am willfully ignoring the rest of your post.

Preditions for 2016? I find this sort of thing really difficult.

2016 is an Olympics year. Medals will be won.

On the world politics front, we are heading for armageddon. Something will have to happen soon. I fear that I will not be fortunate enough to live in a country at peace until the day I die.

In society, we are deteriorating fast. Knowledge, common sense, and reasoning powers are retrogressing. Quizzes will have to get easier and easier. (good old Icy - you keep up the standards at least)

Baby boomers (whoops, I'm one of them) will die off, but many will still be at the fore. Their memories and standards will begin to fade.

There will be birthdays, and there will be Christmas and Easter.

I may or may not be told that I am to become a grandmother for the 3rd time.

So I don't have any specific predictions, but the future is on the whole, not too bright.

Thank heavens for the generation which is now taking over - the 30-year-olds. Many of them have their heads screwed on the right way round.

That's such a good list that I'm not going to try to improve on it.

There will be fresh allegations about doping in the National Press.
There will be a spate of teenage stabbings in London, sparking a knife amnesty.
Mourinho will badmouth Wenger who will respond in a similar manner.
The Tour de France will not start in France.
Boris 'Buffoon' Johnston will deny wanting to be leader of the Conservative Part.
Jeremy Corbyn will continue to divide the Labour Party.
The Conservatives will be sitting on the sidelines, watching, with big grins, the Labour spectacle.
China will lose another rocket.
Voyager will, miraculously, send odd garbled messages, despite being out of range.
An accident will happen aboard the space station, and the Chinese will have to help.
A Briton will win a Nobel prize for something that the Public find unfathomable.
Prince Philip says something that upsets someone.
There will be a March, for something or other, at least once a month to Parliament or Trafalgar Square.
The Middle East conflict will continue but not escalate as too much is at stake.
Nothing will happen on the Isle of Man

MMF

"Prince Philip says something that upsets someone."

And nothing whatsoever will change as a result

Oh, I forgot one. No skill in predicting this though, because it's inevitable:

Roy Keane will have a massive fall out with someone at Euro 2016.

You mean you're not hoping for a miracle?

"In society, we are deteriorating fast."

I assure you, we're not.


"Knowledge, common sense, and reasoning powers are retrogressing."

No they aren't.




Donald Trump will lose the GOP nomination.

Chris Christie will be put forth as the Republican candidate for President. (This may be wishful thinking on my part.)

Trump continues to campaign on his own.

Ultimately he splits the Republican vote and Hilary Clinton is sworn into the White House with little challenge.

Certain imbeciles in Congress (who shall remain nameless) are just as unwilling to cooperate with a female President as they were with a black President.

(Heaven forbid, Lord Almighty, it's the End Times...)

Congress remains deadlocked and useless for at least another eight years.

...

This is getting depressing.

...

On a lighter note, Kung Fu Panda 3 is going to be released in January. It will be the best movie of the year, and spawn even more sequels. (That will be released faster this time because GAAAH!! the wait is maddening!)

In Kung Fu Panda 3, Tigress and Po will finally realize that they belong together forever and ever, and it will be romantic and heartwarming.

But neither will admit it to the other until the very end of the movie -- or not at all -- so it will take until Kung Fu Panda 4 before there's any real resolution on that front. <frustrating & slow>

The Kung Fu Panda TV Show will return to television. Mantis will get more screentime.

And it will be CooOOOool...

...

Also, I will finally get a new coat, a new chair, and a lightsaber.

"The Tour de France will not start in France."

Not a great prediction, MMF - they've already announced it's starting in Utrecht.

Utrecht is in the Netherlands, so it really *isn't* going to start in France. Not that I care, after the discrediting of who knows how many past years of winners due to illegal substances . But if Mr. X can rave about an animated movie "Kung Fu Panda"], I can rave about one, too: "Triplets of Belleville," the only film about the Tour de France that I've ever enjoyed....

[Actually, the one about it I've seen, period....]

Hey man, that's a cool movie.

Thanks for the reassurance, Mr X. Now I read it back, it does come over as something the ancient Greeks were already complaining about.

I've no idea about Kung Fu Panda, but I very much doubt that a film that is released in January will be the "film of the year". Memories are short and by the time the "Film of the Year" in anybody's book is announced, anything that came out between Jan and March will not have a look-in.

"I very much doubt that a film that is released in January will be the 'film of the year'". [TC]

A lot of studios bring their least illustrious films into the theaters in January, knowing that they might as well get something for the money they've paid to make them. Meanwhile, the holdovers form the previous year [many of them introduced in the last week of December] will overshadow them as award nominations begin to multiply.

Nevertheless, I have some fond memories of early-year films of years past: "Identity thief" and "The Nut job" among them . So, if you want to think of "Kung Fu Panda 3" as the best film of the year so far, be my guest. I don't like Hollywood's tricks anyway.

I don't care about "official" announcements, I just mean it will be the BEST!

Besides, it was originally going to be released this December, but they pushed it back so it wouldn't have to compete with the new Star Wars movie. (Since we all know Star Wars would have lost.)