h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have just been at a bar and noticed this: the regulars were friends with the waitress. So anytime one of them came in, he would hug her and either stroke her back or pat. Is there a difference between patting and stroking? Is it just a matter of personal preferrence? If so, are you a patter or a stroker?

Stroking is more sexual. Patting is friendly! When you pat something it's like *Hello. I don't want to touch you that much, so I'll do it as little as possible*...

Of course this doesn't relate to animals...

OK I had to open this thread and see. Whew it wasn't as bad as I thought. Where I'm from "stroking" is a synonym for something not mentioned.

And patting is what you call it when you stroke the fur of a pet. I think americans call that petting.

*considers making a joke but s away giggling instead*

I thought petting was one step below rumpy-pumpy. I agree stroking is more sexual, or at least more sensual. If I hug a male friend I would definitely pat (I'm a straight male). With a female friend I would be more inclined to stroke, but only if she was a fairly close friend. Extensive stroking is reserved for the spousal unit. And the .

That was quite nice, thinking of various people I have hugged in the last several months and trying to remember if I patted or stroked.

"Extensive stroking is reserved for the spousal unit. And the .

hmmm...

isn't petting heavy snogging?

I dunno, by stroking do you mean one way stroking on the back , arms etc or rubbing? Cos rubbing is more like heavy patting. Erm, anyone know where this is going?

patting, stroking, punch in the face, it's all body contact to me....

Hmmm is rubbing = to stroking? Tee Hee. Hey I AM serious. I'd rub with a hug, my Moms/Dads back or an Aunt/Uncle, Siblings for example. They are people I feel close to, Not sexual towards. Maybe the waitress had a bunch of relatives come in People Not comfy with hugging & those whom hug everyone, often use the patty-pat technique.

I thought petting was a little *more* than heavy snogging...usually fingers and unbuttoned things are involved. Mind you...could just be me...

IT IS.

Petting is More I mean!

There's confusion here because the terms petting, patting, rubbing and stroking mean different things in America from Britain and also mean different things with animals than with humans.

In Ireland, I'd say the meanings would be as follows:

For animals:

stroking: moving hand along an animal's fur - good for cats, smooth furred animals

patting: slapping hand against animal without moving it sideways - good for dogs, horses

petting: another name for either of the above

rubbing: another name for any of these three

For humans:

stroking - moving hand along somebody's body; reserved for children, loved ones

patting - slapping hand against body or head - used for close friends

rubbing - word not used with humans

petting - sexual foreplay

I agree with Gnomon. Monty Roberts says that you should stroke a horse rather then pat it, because the former is reminiscent of the way a mare licks her foal.

No back rubs for humans?

I was going to say...in fact, I could really use certain strategic parts of my back and head rubbed at the moment

"petting - sexual foreplay"


So what's heavy petting then?

In a past life I used to wash hair in a hairdressers as a saturday job. OMG the amount of pervy men who would tip me a couple of quid and say 'I like what you are doing to me'. *shudder*

Perhaps heavy petting is the precursor to sexual foreplay, the bit where rudey bits are fondled... not sexual foreplay itself!!

Isn't rubbing heavy stroking but usually for a different purpose? Well I suppose it depends if you are rubbing yourself or if someone else is rubbing you - I think I'd better stop there.....