h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

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80 or so years ago Agatha Christie said:

"Women don't need the vote, they need arming."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/F19585?thread=148770 this is an ongoing, current situation. no abstractions, this is happening to an h2g2 member now.

I see Wall Flower Girl has posted the link.

To the cop, you want a viewpoint from the Coroner's Office, see that thread. There is a lot that never ever even gets looked at, because there was no "crime".

To the people who said things like "any woman who doesn't leave is crazy", re-read the beginnings of this thread, and go read the other one. How did you miss the total brainwashing, dependency and terror creating aspect?

To the person named Arpeggio, THANK YOU for having the incredible guts to tell your story, and to tell the truth, and to share your obvious in-depth knowledge of the psych stuff that I don't know anything about. As I said to someone else, the world has a way of hating people who speak the truth so eloquently, but if those who can don't, nothing's going to change, ever.

One tired old man...

Quincy

That's a long thread. I've taken a look at it, and its kind of intimdating.

I know a lot of things don't get investigated because there's no crime, but we deal in crimes. We don't really have time to deal with them. We definitly don't have time to mess around in civil matters.

Neither do we, pal, neither do we. On City time, just the facts. Establish the real cause of death and don't get into the story behind the story, because we are underpaid, understaffed, overworked, overcrowded, and our facilities are out of date.

I don't know where you are, but in New York City, we have civil servants who do their best to go above and beyond the minimum necessary. I dare anyone to say different to me. Anyone.

Maybe you do too. Alls I'm saying is the world knows WE do. And I am damn proud of New York City for the most caring, devoted civil servants I've ever been priveleged to work with.

Twenty-two years I've been a forensic pathologist. I've heard bosses say "we don't have the time" plenty, and it was true, we do not have the extra anything. But it don't TAKE time to see things like half-healed hairline fractures in ribs, when you're already looking in a chest cavity. It isn't part of the official cause of death, but when I file the report, "repeated blows to the head over a period of many years" will be in it. It was part of the condition of the body I examined.

I'm dedicated to what I do and I'm sure you are too. We see a lot you guys don't, and don't want to. You see a lot we don't, and you guys and ladies put your LIVES on the line. For that, I for one take off my hat to you.

Quincy

Nurses see a lot of it, as well. I picked up the phone many times, with and without the permission of my employers, calling abuse in to social services, and helping women, men and kids report this kind of treatment, as well as getting the victoms lined up with advocates or finding placement in shelters. I was only a student, but I never missed the opportunity to document such cases in the patients' charts, and always got either the doctor or head nurse to make an entry verifying my own observations.
Yes, these women are brainwashed. That's why I made the call for them, while they were still in the hospital, and why the documentation is needed; To prove a history of abuse. That way, if you can't get the victom to leave their abuser, he/she has proof of the abuse in a legal document. This can help a victom prosecute her/his abuser, or recieve help.
If worse comes to worse, and someone is killed, then there is evidence to work with. A victom can prove mitigating circumstances, and an abuser can be prosecuted.
I have always maintained that the woman in this senario was not capable of rational thought. Anyone living through this kind of abuse needs medical help.
Many victims of abuse do get out alive. My own sister did. Many do not.

As I said, I'll work hard for a victim once. If they reject the help, then I'm not going to bang my head against a wall. We can't force anyone to do something.

I had a domestic kidnapping once. I met with the witness who was the sister in law. She told us what had happened. I watched the way her and her husband interacted, and I thought it was pretty clearly an abusive relationship. Based on her statement, I woke a judge up, and obtained a warrant for kidnapping. I went into another juridsiction, and go them to help me serve the thing. Niether of the women wanted to be moved to a shelter. The next day in court, the victim told the judge she didn't know why the police came to her house.

I had another instance where a guy beat his wife up. We talked her into going to a shelter. She got a TPO. The husband violated, and I got a warrant for him for Aggravated Stalking. When I found him later, I got him with some cocaine. The judge reduced the Aggravated Stalking to Violation of a Court Order. The guys mother kept saying he just needed help. She was right, he needed potassium chloride. She bonded him out. His lawyer inssted his guns were surrendered to somene else. Then he came up and destroyed his mother property. He was arrested again, and we found his guns on him. I swear to god, I wouldn't care if that b*****d killed his mother. I'm convicned that he'll kill someone.

That was more of a vent than a story to illustrate a point.

ANyway, there is a flip side to this. The domestic violence laws have become pretty draconian. We're now required to arrest in situations where there's a momentary slip or shaky probable cause in relationships that clearly aren't abusive. It's a sad situation.

In a free nation, you can't force anyone to do something until they commit a crime.