h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'd be Ken - God of Jam

Why not try Priapus, go on look it up.(Grek I think)

Ooh, yes, can I be a devil instead? Or at least a minor demon? I can't help thinking that it would be more fun. I could be Abraxas, or I could be the dark overlord of the underworld himself. (whilst there is some debate as to the gender of 'God', no one seems to even question the idea that Beelzebub is male- maybe because of all the stupid tricks he falls for so often...) Hmm. Yup. Definitely a demon for me. Whilst most major religions seem to have different places for their gods to reside, Hell seems to be a fairly widespread phenomenon.

ummmmm..... (looks up at her title).... it didn't take too long for my ego to make itself known, did it?

Why mess around with gods when you can be the Goddess?

You have a choice of maiden, mother or crone, to suit the circumstances, drawing power from the moon and the tides, and lots of lovely ritual. You get to be in at the birth and in at the death, co-ordinate the love affairs of young maidens, dance around bonfires and have incredible hot sex with the Hunter...

My first thought was Anubis - you know the Egyptian one with the `s head. My second thought after looking Anubis up was that it wasn`t that exciting being God of mummification and tombs. My third thought was that with a dogs head you might be able to ** *** lick **** *** **** .

I'll get me coat

Red

*peers at own name*

Okay, okay, strictly speaking not a God, more a High Priest, but - able to bend space time into so many dimensions it hurts, driving people insane just by looking at them blow him up with a nuclear weapon and all you get is millions of radioactive copies...that's my kind of God... Now if only I can get out of R'lyeh...

Blow him up with nuclear bombs? Now that sounds like somebody abusing Lovecraft.

"Hmmm, nuclear bombs..." thinks the Great Daghda, as he pulls a chicken vindaloo and a pint of lager from his Cauldron O' Plenty.

Just extending the mythos slightly...

i thought great good well thought out question/good convesation point but i have had endless nights of pondring and suffering to come up this the most profound answer for myself and came up with nothing more than more thinking and pondreing maybe just maybe i post this and will be free from the nights and days of thinking about this.

Ganesh - hands everywhere, head of an elephant, rideing on a Rat. Hey it sounds like me on a Saturday night.

You're welcome Baggyfish

--Apollo

Wasn't Ganesh also bright Red with one broken tusk and a pot belly ?

Your Saturday nights sound fun Wandawoman - where can we sign up ?

Red

I think I would be "O'God Shut-up"

If I am athiest does that mean that I would suffer from low self esteem?

Not exactly, PG. I think the psychobabble term for that is "being in denial".

PUN ALERT!!!


Or Baby Moses syndrome as I think it's called


ALERT OVER

Was that a purple alert of just a yellow alert?
It seemed quite loud to me.

I think I will be the god of apathy. I am sure that is a fairly laid back job but curiously in much demand these days.

I saw the CAPITALS and got here as quick as I could. Do you have a licence or was this an unauthorised use of capitalisation ?

Red Dog the Keeper

Apart from the Tusk, Ganesh is sounding more like my double!

If you live in London and visit Soho often, you're bound to come across me!