h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Affy eyes the cafeteria warily*

I never did get used to that place....

*spits out PAG, bow and arrows at the ready*

*the ape suddenly jerks awake, sees the intruders and tries to reach for the big orange button on the desk, but falls off the chair instead*

Ook! [My arms and legs have gone to sleep!]


*the gobold sees GDZ's gesture just as the ape falls to the floor with a muffled thump, drops his papers on the nearest desk and walks over to another gobold who appears to be swopping out pieces inside a server*

*after a few words, they glance quickly toward the airlock room, then walk behind a large rack. A moment later a human head pokes round the side of the stack and stares at them, then moves carefully forward, keeping the equipment between himself and the doors on the right*

*he mouths the word HELP*


*the human is wearing a gray jumpsuit with U46995 stenciled across the front and back*

*pulls some duct tape out of her backpack and kneels to truss up the ape and cover its mouth*

That guy reminds me of someone.

Actually, he reminds me of serveral people. More than several, even.

some of whom remind me of the Final Fantasy series


*tiptoes after Lil*

Some of whom aren't even people....


*Refrains from tiptoing, instead finds some shadows to slink through*

*Moves into the room, trying to keep track of the gobolds.*

*points at the numb ape and laughs* Ook! [Ha ha ha!]

Now that we've reached the long-sought Admin Level 2, how shall we proceed?

Quietly until we see the enemy and then, VERY loudly!

*looks around Kung Fu Styleee*

*Notices an old-fashioned infra-red eye near the floor. He points it out to some and steps over it in an exagerated fashion*

*Looks for signs of other eyes and steps over the one already seen*

Do you suppose there are ears about as well?

Not if this place is still the way I remember it. Areas like this were always done Bond-villain style.

But we shouldn't risk it, anyway. Good thinking.

*The eye seems to go from the wall to the desk, because no alarm was tripped when Lil went behind the desk to truss up the security ape*

*whispering* There are buttons on the desk. One is red with the word HELP on it. One is orange and doesn't say anything. And one is green and says OPEN.

I'm open to your advice.

My advice is to leave the help button alone, Lil.

Actually, it's a good thing you asked. This's come up before, a long time ago, back when GL and I were working with someone named Lady Pennywhistle (no relation to Penny from the Atelier). We mentioned that we'd intentionally mislabel buttons and levers and things.

Now, if this place still keeps old CLI practice, then the labels will be incorrect. Still, if this place keeps old CLI practice, then either should be safer than the orange one.

*steps over the invisible beam a la Bond movie style*

*keeps her hands and elbows in to avoid touching buttons*

*like 'Wet Paint' signs, 'Don't Touch' warnings only increase the temptation to do just that*

/* Slips behind the desk with Lil */

Under normal circumstances we would never press the orange button, right? Well these aren't normal circumstances. I say "orange".

<-- sniffing around the tree trunk of cables