h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Twitches are caused by an iron deficiency

I am really Kate Moss

Seeing a falling carrot is an omen of good luck.

I`m a good person.

I have a friend with 13 toes.

I actually do have thirteen toes.

Worldwide, 36 miles of hair grow every day.

I've seen Azathoth's thirteen toes.

Yes, Kittie went to heaven.

Eating your crusts makes your hair curly
Playing with egg shells really does cause warts (just look at my nose)
Babies have red hair cos mum ate too many carrots
If you eat brussel sprouts when you become old your sexual appetite doubles.

Brussel's sprouts are the most delicious food on earth.

The average parking ticket is issued 28 minutes after the meter runs out.

Brussel sprouts little bundles of goodness and wonderment.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away
If at first you don't succeed give up

Shoes soles are made of 90% sea water and 10% porcelain.

Footbacon is actually Footham.

Correction:

Lord Footham.

I respect you all the more now that I know you come from good stock.

One day if we are not careful penguins will rule the earth.

cures all known ills


Crusts explains why I have straight hair!

Careful penguins? I guess they'll be rather reckless.