h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*the middle dog beast sprouts wings and leaps into the air. it glides back down in a very threatening way. talons are exposed as it zooms in on werekitty*

*unsheathes her claws and leaps into the dog, meeting it in mid air*

You STINK Dogbreath!

*bits it's throat, and rakes it's belly with her legs*

*the dog beasts shredded abdomen lays waste to its insides. it slumps to the ground a lifeless heap flesh and blood. the other two dogs advance in a slower more cautious manner. they have death in their eyes and rage on their minds*

...
hear doggie doggie doggie....
whos a good dog then....

*they pan out and begin to circle Anthea and Werekitty. one pounces and takes a swipe at anthea. the other just glares at werekitty.*

*feels a little stunned from her fall to the floor and squares off to the second dog*

Anthea - What weapon are you using?

erm...
the only power i have is to be able to talk in and translate any language....
but phenom dident say anytrhing about weponery....
although i think i still have my sword.....

[the only projectile weaponry allowed are spears or bows and arrows]

[but i can keep the sword?]
"good doggie now roll over"

*the dog beast bares its yellow teeth and a long sliver of drool dangles from its jaw to the ground. it lunges forward clawing and snapping randomly*

"bad dog beast"
"lie down"
*realises this aint really working*

Anthea - you can talk to them! You can speak in any language. That means you can communicate with anything with any level of sentiency. I'll bet you could even talk to the trees!
Ask it why it's attacking us.

*leaps on the back of the other dog and clamps it's neck between her jaws*

Could you tell this one I'll kill it if it and it's friend don't go away and leave us alone?

*looks at dog*
"why you attacking us"
*turns to the other dog....*
"she will kill you if you dont tell your friend to leve us alone"

*both dogs stop and sit. werekitty's dog lies down and relaxes. anthea's dog stares for a while and appears to be thinking. after what seems like an eternity of being stared at by a blackhole te dog speaks.*

dog 1 - because we do.

"why"
"there is no reason for you to attack us"

dog 1 - there is the game.

What did he say?

See if they're commanded by anyone.

*shifts her grip slightly and holds onto the dogs shoulders a little more gently*

you don't taste very nice.

"oh so this is a game"
"well who is the leader"
thay say its a game....

dog 1 - the darkness

*dog 2 physically tensed at that and turned sharp to take a bite out of werekitty. dog 1 just sat there.*

not much fun for that one

*points at the sad heap of fur she'd previously killed*