h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*It's a small shop, with tastefully blue walls, and a black floor. The walls have all sorts of poisons, darts, daggers, crossbows, rifles, scopes, grapples and other tools of the assassin trade. Mytrunner is leaning back behind the counter, his feet up and reading a book.*

I was wondering if I could get some poison for the edge of my claymore.

*Notices Skullock over the brim of the book, and puts it down. Takes off half-moon glasses, for effect, and stands up.*

Right-oh! What sorts do you need? Quick acting, slow acting, agonizing, unnoticable? Anything tickle your fancy?

Hmmm...Agonizing sounds good. Maybe something that keeps the wound from healing...

Hmmm... burning, with an anti-coagulant... Let's see...

*Mystrunner begins to take various vials out from under the counter.*

A bit of bloat, a bit of...

*He dumps the contents of a few vials into a pestle, and grinds them for a while. He then deposites the contents in another, better quality vial, seals it, and puts it in a centerfuge.*

It'll be a few minutes... know any stories?

Erm...well...Yeah but most of them start with "once upon a time."

Ah, too bad. Nothing wrong with 'em, but they usually take a while.

*The centerfuge whirs to a stop, and chirrups. Mystrunner reaches over, and extracts the vial, now filled with a viscous, blood-red fluid. He gives it to Skullock.*

Coat the edge of your blade with it, and dry it under a high, dry heat for eight hours. Repeat every two months, or every month if used a lot. Blood dilutes it a bit.

How will you be paying?

Erm...Put it on my tab?

*taps a finger on the counter.*

A tab shows unwarrented optimism about the future. However, seeing as you are MJ12, it's on the house. Nice, eh?

Yay I knew being a member would have perks! Or i was just gonna pay with this gold that I pickpocketed from you when we were fighting at S.T.U.M.P.E.D.

*Slowly puts back on the spectacles, and looks over the lenses.*

*And grins*

Good for you. You earned it.

Thank you. So, what are you reading anyway?

"The Book Of The Five Rings." It's a five hundred and something year old samurai handbook. Very interesting. I'm considering stocking it...

*Walks in, looking about, notices Myst at the counter and Skull mulling about.*

Hey Myst, hi Skull.

*She slaps a bag of gold coins pointedly on teh counter* Hey Must, you wouldn't happen to have any mithril arrows, would you? I'm running rather low. *Noticed the poison Skull is eyeing, and raises an eyebrow.* For your claymore, right? ...touch me what that thing, and I /swear/ you'll regret it...

*Nods, and pulls several long, slender wooden cases off of a back shelf. He takes the lids off, revealing several different varieties of glistening arrows, some very boring and sharp, others intricatly carved, and a few etched with mystic runes, glowing with power.*

What can I interest you in?

*crosses her eyes* i RelY gUd aut spEleeng.

Hmm. Well... *looks at the plain ones* May I check them, then?

Sure thing. Feel them for yourself. I also have crossbow bolts, if needed. I'll be in the back. Offline for a bit

*picks up one of the plainer arrows and begins examining it. It glows with a bright blue nimbus as she touches it. She smiles and places it back in the case. She begins examining the other arrows, with more or less the same result*

I'm glad I brought a lot of gold... Numenor, there goes my savings...