h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Your in big trouble now. My detention is unlawful, I was denied a fair trial (and the legal standing of the court martial in general has been called into question by the European Court of Human Rights). Already a petition has been started to comapign for my release. http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/alabaster/F97320?thread=258696&post=3152639#p3152639 Let me go now and we'll say nothing more.

tut tut here is our evidence against you http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/alabaster/F97320?thread=205755&latest=1 you don't seem to be showing people that now do you! i also know you used the stolen contraband as a weapon on the battlefield by dropping it from a plane! creachy mp

I am not contesting the fact that I did it. But I was denied due process, my caution was not correct hence I am being unlawfully detained. I hope you have a good lawyer.

you walked in to guardroom. you were arrested by ralph in the correct manner. i threw you in cell and ate key. you admit crime but start petition for your release (which no-one has signed)..........looks quite legal to me......oh yeah, do you want to make a call?

creachy mp

I have not been cautioned correctly, for starters you have only just advised me that I can make a call. Hence any alledged confession on my part are inadmissable.

Oh dear, every second that ticks by a further travesty of justice for which General Terran will hold you accountable (possibly).

Ok what's happening

Well Tosh you have been detained in the proper manner for this army anyway

*hands Tosh the phone*

Make your call and we'll proceed from there, sorry guys but I can't hand out promotians

who said anything about promotions, i just suggested you award him a star, you know, a commendation point.

* at tosh*

Ok I'll take your recommendation into consideration

*flicks pencil sharpenings at tosh*

who's got the key? i got the key.
where is the key? it's in my belly!

*Tosh picks up phone*

Hi Kofi Annan, its Tosh here...

Yeah, it's terrible.....

No respect for Human Rights.....

Emergency Meeting of UN Security Council, that sounds good...

Motion authorising use of force against Creacy including a surgical team to remove key...

Even the French signing up for it!

actually reefgirl can't command ralph around, them being the same rank and all. actually, the whole idea of the regiment split was that people in each regiment only could control and comand people below them in that regiment.

how many mps do we have? if it is just ralph, creachy and reefgirl then those could be considered the head MPs ofeach regiment, and new mps come under the control of that trio.

very complicated issues...

ay they are. but the more pressing matter is how long do we keep tosh locked up for for stealing food and alcohol from the senior officers mess? thats the biggy.

creachy

Did I miss something, does anyone remember me giving Ralph a command, Creachy, Ralph and any other MP out there do you want me in command of the MP's or are wee all equal now

Ps I thought communisum was dead

*waves Red Flag*

There then thats all finished then!

argh! captain a.j rimmer has pardoned tosh! me thinks tosh is a bumlick so we may as well let him go now.

*runs into the latrine carrying a pack of laxatives.*

Tosh was part of the planning and preparation of a very important strategic operation Creachy!
I could have you arrest yourself for implying that I would do such a thing!

*shouts from the latrine*
or i could arrest you for obstruction of justice! but under the circumstances this time i let it drop. i am quite political like that.

creachy mp

*looks very sulky and goes off to hang up some more no-smoking signs up in his room*

*comes out of latrine holding key gingerly in some tissue. unlocks cell reluctantly and beckons tosh to leave........quickly!

creachy

Thanks Captain Rimmer,

Nah nah na nah na Creachy, that will teach you to mess with me. Your lucky you're not in there instead of me. Slightly disappointed though, as I was planning to break out at 2 in the morning.

Never mind.