h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have thrice attempted to write an interesting response to the appearance of Darth Zaphod, something to the effect of "Cool", but alas, my computer grinds to a resounding halt at the "Post Message" button, and thus, due to the frustration caused by this, I have thus not been on lately. I apologize.

The great pyramids of Egypt now stand a full 3 miles south of the spot where they were originally built. That's how much the earth's surface has shifted in the last 4500 years

There are more Puerto Ricans in New York than in San Juan.

It has been said that an infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters given an infinite amount of time would eventually write Shakespeare's entire works. By the same logic, an infinite number of rednecks, with an infinite number of shotguns, shooting an infinite number of stop signs for an infinite amount of time would eventually write Shakespeare's entire works in braille.
I know this doesn't fit, but i wanted to post it.

The appearance of ME?! *sniff sniff* I feel so special tee hee

DZ

hey DZ

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

The average chocolate bar has 8 insects' legs in it.

oooh, very nifty

If you take the number of times a cricket chirps, divide by 2, add 9, then divide by 2 again, you will get the correct temperature in celcius.

DZ

give or take 4.75 degrees.

Oh yeah, i shall add you to the list now...

Humans are born with 2 genetically predetermined fears

1) Being afraid of loud noises

2) Being afraid of heights (Except the Apache indians who no longer have this genetically implanted imperfection resulting in that many work on comercial sky scraper construction jobs)

List? What list?

DZ

The list of official members, listed on me pers'nal space.

OH WOW COOL! *sigh* ok, I'm fine now...

DZ

there's a list? since when?
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

Err it's been there for a while..just inactive...
Ooo I think I'll go do that then moose..think lockers count?

Only 2 places in the world have any smallpox virus stored. Atlanta, Georgia (USA) and I believe the other one is somewhere in Russia..

"Video Killed the Radio Star" (favorite song of Andrew's) was the first music video ever to be played on the new-for-1980 MTV.

The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.

That's per year, not a whole lifetime.

really? oh well..that's disgusting...

Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined

the diferent flavors of mints at Starbucks, though having the same price, have their own unique cash register code.

That's not a surprise! That's just common business sense

If Jesus was real etc., there's no way he could have been hung from the cross by his hands and still have died ON the cross.