h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm sure some nice kind researcher could arrange that Alec - for me too as well?

It's the weekend after we come back from our hols & also we're going to a wedding that day so there's no way we can attand

Then 'I' will need another bearer, then?

you 'n me both amy...

got any ideas ??

alec.

What the..Where the..How the f..did I get in here..Waddles up to the bar..Err any chance of a bevvy ther arr kid

*calls ovver from by t dartbooerd, 'avin just missed double one again*

mebby i can sign thee in as a guest like and buy thee a drink.

What yer 'avin then? ale?...vodka'n vimto?



I'll gladly propose thee fer membership but we'll need a seconder

alec.

*grumble*

Ya'd think I'da learned in Light's fanclub not to stand near the dartboard, but Alec's so good normally that it's safe, I thought...

Nice clean holes take *forever* to heal...

Oh, and I'll second

Tah Lah I'll have a if I can. It's thirsty work all this soaring around the Oceans. Sorry about the double. Probably got distracted by the big white bird waddling about. Can I become a country member because I spend a lot of my time at sea ? ...

Err.. its gone awful quiet. Did I say somethin

Any chance of one of those pickled eggs with my

Cheers..burp...sorry

*alec sends another dart thudding into double 18*

pickled eggs...'elp thi sen Albert, but don't get no feathers in t jar, committee'll av a fit.

alec.

Lah am reet famished..atempting to disguise his scouse accent.
Ow mooch is dat den..Sneeeze..sorry bloody vinegars got up me beak

Put thy geld away Albert lad...my treat.

'av another while we're waitin fer t committee to turn up.


...tha looks like tha's gorra sharp eye...any good at arras?

alec.

*clears throat, coughs slightly and asserts authoritative presence*

Ahem. As treasurer of this 'ere society, Ah'd like to welcome the gurt big seagull up to t'bar. We are honoured and reet chuffed by the visit. Mine's a Alec and tha'd best be puttin' enough brass in that there till lad.

*removes flat cap and tugs forelock*

look sharp Albert...it's a committee member

i resemble the insinuation that i might not be puttin enuff geld in t'coffer...if thart treasurer then tha count it.



alec.

and mine's a double <vodka&vimto>

Ey up Albert 'ow do lad. Reckon we'll 'ave ta get a new sign for t'privy, Men - Women - Albatrosses

Nah then, ah'm just abaut to add thee to t'page and all assembled 'ere knows what that means.............

It's your round lad



*wanders off reciting a Stanley Holloway monologue*

Mine's a warm ,stout .

Can't Big Bird use the same 'arrangements' as t'pidgins?

*remembers how his grandad used to stand in the garden,waiting for the racing pigeons to come home, then, when they did, they would hang around on the roof and grandad would make nice pigeon noises and rattle the seed tin to try and persuade them to come down so he could 'clock em in'*

ey up amyart orreet?
ey up granny...thought you was on yer 'ols already.

looks like yon Alberts asleep, an i can't see no 'stick wi an 'orses 'ead 'andle...

anyroad...mines a

alec.

Don't fret Albert, we'll sort summat out for thee.

*checks contents of money drawer
... this tenner's got holes right thru! Reckon Alec's gettin' better with them arras. And don't tek offence lad, tha's proved thissen not to be shy with t'pennies.

*places sponsorship form strategically on the bar*

Err alrite, alrite, calm down. Ow mooch is a round of and don't forget t'pickled egg, an tak one fort'self lah..(slipin in ant'owt of scouse accent) Do I have to sign anythin. Arras, arras thrre o one double off??.....

Hi Amy, the 's tomorrow isn't it. Is Ormy still collecting funds for you at the meet in London?

*scribbles name on sponsorship form.