h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

shagbark returns and settles in to listen to some sea shanties on his head-phones.

shagbark gets up and sleepwalks up to the foredeck.

shagbark returns.
time for a few zzz's


..
shagbark pats his cutlass and smiles

...

another great day to be a
shagbark leaves for Pelican's nest.

shagbark returns and dusts off apainting
http://www.ebsqart.com/Art/Gallery/OIL/586003/Sunset-Ocean-.jpg
now where did I freemantle that.
To tired to remember
places cutlass in stand and stretches out in bunk

shagbark returns with a small green house guest.
OK Kermit you can hide here awhile.
Lets see what's on the Tele.
Shagbark presses tghe button on a remote and a small TV above the night stand popds on with the words PIGS IN SPACE.

Sorry Captain, was our television too loud?

what?

Anyway, Kermit is gone now.

On facebook they had a quiz: What tim Burton Character are you like-
The answer (a good one for a
My Result: Sweeney Todd
What Tim Burton character are you?
Whether you hoped for it or not, you are the lean, mean throat-cutting machine! You want it your way or nothing. You can hold grudges literally forever and you never forget a face.

you are perfect for your job

shagbark puts up a new sign:
Nuts to you I'm going to sleep it off.

He enters and places his cutlass on it's stand.
I wonder where the captain is?
mumble
mumble
mumble

shagbark wakes up well, time to get up to the lookout
takes the sign from his door and throws it into the chipper.
wonders if I threw a Brit's head in there do you suppose it would chip his lip?

shagbark sleep walks into his quarters tucks his cutlass into bed and hoists himself into the cutlass stand.

shagbark wakes up- what am I doing in the cutlass stand?
shagbark extricates himself straps on his cutlass and goes to check out the ship.

shagbark rummages around and comes up with an old well oiled skeleton key. He goes out and two doors to the left ulocks a closet from which he unstacks four barrels a pump and a heater. He returns to the pelican's nest.

Deep in the hidden corridors of the Blood of the Zaphodistas
Shagbark turns a skeleton key and opens the door to his music room.
He goes to a cabinet and digs out his boom-box and puts on a caribbean steel drum melody.

If the tune sounds familiar it is because Jimmy buffett had it first





Potawatami fatherland, you've held me captive to long.
I need to change me lattitude and sing a pirate song.
while the world just fades away, while the world just fades away.

I am a virtual pirate, been one for many years
Ran the international toaster, drank lighthouse girl virtual beers
sailing away O sailing away.

The Blood of the Zaphodistas
The Jolly Roger she flew.
While I sat in the Pelicans nest without any cuirfew.
sailing away, just sailing away.

Old Chief Okemos- he died at 83
He looked across the Lookingglass river
But never such a sight did he see
As I'm seeing here--as I'm seeing here.

So I am old shagbark
writing down this song.
I been friterin away the days and years
as the shadows grow long as the shadows grow long
lookin for sixty-five.
Dear old Franklin Roosevelt
what a thought you had
did you know your federal pozi scheme
would be an old mans dream- lookin at sixty five lookin at sixty five.
Potowatami Fatherland
Can this mess you fix
The great fathers in Washington DC went and made it sixty-six
Oh yes they did Oh yes they did.
Will I get there before it becomes seventy
that is something only the future can see
as the shadows grow long as the shadows grow long
I am a virtual pirate, been one for many years
Ran the international toaster, drank lighthouse girl virtual beers
sailing away O sailing away.
Lyrics by William Hubbell 26 April 2011

maybe we should have a pirate-singer/songwriter and/or poem contest?

I think Shagbark has the job of Poet. But he didn't know. So break out the Moet, before he's inclined to show it, and grabs a 's