h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Child of Saunola , glad you joined us ...

i think the best place for us to go would be to the Dry Tortugas.
that's a little group of islands about 70 miles west of here, we could go in the big orange landing craft and be there in oh a couple of hours.
It is a nature reserve, lots of pelicans, an enormous ruined castle built entirely of red-bricks called Fort Jefferson, surrounded by shallows and reefs full of fish and amazing corals.

They have the largest cannon i have ever seen, and a hot-shot oven.

let's GO !

alec.

*grabs her beach bag and heads for the landing craft*

*starts making sandwiches for the journey*

we can leave the tent up for when we get back...

*rigs big stripey canvas awning over landing craft for a bit of shade*

*checks oil, water, fuel, ice and alcohol levels...tops up with a

i think we're just about ready to go Caerwynn...*starts engines*

*jumps in the craft at the last second*

...glad you could make it Mr. Plato Sir...*salutes smartly*

*wipes mayonnaise from forehead*

*puts engines in reverse and backs off the beach, throws engines into forward gear and curls away expertly from the strand like he's done this before*

"i've done this before"

alec.

There is a bright orange blur zipping across the turqoise waters
where the Straits of Florida meet the Gulf of Mexico.
The landing craft is planing along at 40 knots.
As we approach the Dry Tortugas, a flock of pelicans take off and fly around Fort Jefferson in perfect formation.
Now in shallower water, we reduce speed and hang over the side,
gazing in awe at the landscape revealed below us.

There are so many different coloured corals, of all shapes and sizes,
with schools of fish...tropical fish with a riot of patterns weaving
in and out of the underwater formations.

*cuts the engines and throws out a sandbag anchor so as not to damage the coral*

well here we are then...let's go for a swim...

alec.

What a lovely place!

Nearly as beautiful as an Island I used to know as Emerald Island, now called Pangkor Laut with a hotel on it

*leaves landing craft and rummages in her beach bag for snorkel mask and flippers*

:Climbs out of the massive trench he has been digging aroung the sandcastle to find everyone has left:
guys, hello? Oh well, I'll just fly over in the beerkeg and see if i can find them.
:10 minutes later crashes right next to the pirates:
Um hey guys, little help over here, my ship's stuck in the sand

Nice place...

*snorkel snorkel*

sorry chaps...can't hear a thing underwater...

*snorkel snorkel*

The buzz of a twin engine plane can be heard in the distance, it grows louder until the plane, a Grummond Goose, circles the reef and touches down on the crystal sea.
climbs out the side hatch outfitted in snorkel mask, fins, snorkel and infalted sea horse swim ring, jumps into the water and after a wave at the sandy-haired pilot swims toward the pirate's craft. Out the window of the plane as it taxis away can be heard the sound of a guitar strummed by the co-pilot as the pilot sings
Changes in latitiudes
Changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
With all of our running and all of our cunning
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane

Well it was certainly nice of Jimmy to give me a lift on his way to a bit of fly-fishing nearby. Oh my look at that coral.

*hastily extracates self from luggage compartment*



*gets out snorkel*



i love snorkelling . i once went scuba diving off Crete which was muchly fun!

! that is muchly impressive!

*is muchly impressed* *

*goes snorkelling*

*Wonders if Jimmy served a Buffet lunch on his 'plane ....*

*bubble emitting from snorkel as she bobs under could be translated as saying..*

That is on my screensaver.

*is nibbled by a fish*

ack! That always happens to me!

:Starts using a crane to put the broken parts of the Beerkeg back together: Kobreikini starts playing.
why is the tetris them playing i just put the last piece in and the beerkeg vanished Not again. Everyone watch out, the improbibility drive means it will reappear but i ahve no idea where or when so watch out.

*watches the procedings from afar, continuing with building the sandcastle and ignoring the backlog...*

sandcastle

let's go for a wander around Fort Jefferson...

it is huge, the outer walls take up almost the entire area of the key it is built upon.

it is made entirely out of red brick.

if anyone remembers the Roundhouse at Camden, it is similar, with brickwork arches stretching off into the distance.

the outer walls are some 40ft thick.

there are still cannon mounted on the tops of the walls, one is 30ft long, with a breech diameter of about 8ft.

Dr. Samuel Mudd was imprisoned here for many years.

in the centre is a 'hot-shot' oven ; a brick-built kiln with a Z shaped set of internal rails...cold cannonball in at the top...
red-hot cannonball out at the bottom...carry it up to the top of the wall, load into cannon and fire...result: burning hole in ship!!

alec.