Welcome to the h2g2 TyPolytechnic

This august institution is devoted to the promotion of alternative typography and to rewarding those who do not allow their creative genious to be stifled by the constraints of conventional spelling.

The Typolytechnic

Senza Timore Scribere

Principal:

Ugi MAT

-
keeper
of Typos and Spelling Errers

Senior Lecturer:

LighthousgirlUK DrAT (Hon.)

The TyPoly offers a wide range of courses designed to offer help and support to Alternative Typographers of all levels, from those who are just beginning to throw off the shakles of spelling slavery through to those who are already masters of their craft.

Courses at the TyPolytechnic

The TyPolytechnic is a home study college, allowing you to work in your own time and at your own pace. Once you have completed a piece of work, you should submit it to a thread below and our experienced staff will consider your application for a suitable award. Just let us know where and when you made a typo. If you think it is worthy of one of the higher awards, you might like to say why.

The following awards are currently on offer from the h2g2 TyPolytechnic (beginnig with the most senior).

Professor of Alternative Typography (PrAT)

This is the highest honour currently offered by the Typoly and has not been awarded within h2g2 to date. It will take truly exceptional devotion or undeniable genius to achieve this one - Keep trying!

Currently, the only recipient of the PrAT is the US ex-vice-president Dan Quaile for "correcting" 'Potato' to 'Potatoe' in front of half the world's press and dozens of TV crews, thereby exposing him to a liftime of public ridicule. Congratulations Dan!

Doctor of Alternative Typography (DrAT)

Awarded for years of dedication to the cause of amusing typography, this award currently has only one, honorary, recipient; The Typoly's Senior Lecturer

LighthousgirlUK DrAT (Hon.)

for her dedication to the TyPoly and all it stands for.

Master of Alternative Typography (MAT)

Offered for a single instance of the most humourous or unfortunate mis-spelling or for persistant used of amusing typography.

This award is claimed by the Typolytechnic Principal

Ugi

for use of the phrase "organised pubic chemistry demonstrations" in his CV, of all places!

For the persistant use of "pubic" in place of "public", in newspapers and similar publications, particulary for the use of the phrase "pubic drunkenness" and the headline "Expansion at the pubic library", the award of Master of Alternative Typography has been awarded to Jimi X MAT

Mr X also holds the degree of Bachelor of Alternative Typography (see below)

Bachelor of Alternative Typography (BAT)

Offered for a single piece of work including a humorous or baffling typo, this is currently the Typoly's most popular course. No previous experience required!

Current recipients include:

• Archangel Galaxy Babe BAT
  knows even more than we think:
  here!
• Jimi X MAT
  creates the world's longest railway:
  here!
  
• Vogonpoet BAT
  mounts an unprovoked attack on fellow researchers:
  here!
  
• Pheloxi* BAT
  for the creation of the 'MayQuietMonster':
  here!
  

  
  The MayQuietMonster curretnly resides at the
  
  h2g2 TypOrphanage
  
  which is home to any and all people and creatures created as a result of careless keystrokes. If you know of a typo-created creature remember, our doors are always poen!
  

• Feisor BAT
  for the creation of the 'Ugli', whatever that is: here!
  

  
  Since Feisor talks to the Ugli, it must be a creature and so has also found a home at the
  
  h2g2 TypOrphanage
  

• Gwennie BAT
  gets confused by parts of her anatomy:
  here!
  
• BART BAT
  invents a mouth watering delicacy:
  here!
  

• ****STOP PRESS****
  
  A new recipient of the TyPoly BAT
  

  Engländer BAT
  boasts of his exploits with Hati:
  here!
  

Ordinary Alternaive Typography Level (OAT)

Awarded for general typos without any requirement for amusement value, almost everyone in h2g2 deserves one of these, so apply to get your "OAT"s today!

Prospectus

As well as hosting the Training Arena for Lexicographic Creativity TALC (see below) the Typolytechnic offers courses which will improve your skills and knowledge in this area and provide you with the opportunity to hone your skills in a supportive environment, guided by our highly skilled and experienced Tutors

Courses currently enrolling students are:

• W.A.R.T.
  - Wobely Alternate or Reactionary Typology
  
• C.A.T.
  - Computer Aided Typology
  

Follow the links or see the threads below to enroll.

Department for Lexicographic Creativity

A basic skill for an alternative typographer is the creation of new words by minor changes to existing ones. In order to help develop this ability, the TyPolytechnic has set up the Training Arena for Lexicographic Creativity (T.A.L.C.) to allow students to practice and hone their skills. See the T.A.L.C. thread below to join in.