h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm sorry, that was very rude of me. Would you care for some late lunch? I think the penguins are making pavlova.

I'm running late with lunch, have just made mozzarella and tomato salad. Pavalova for pudding does sound tempting.

The penguins at the zoo aren't being at all productive or co-operative, they are still struggling to catch the stragglers.

They thought they would till they got bored or hungry or both but when they tried to start up the banana boat and parents started to complain about the one that had 'taken a shine' to the inflatable they decided that they would have to intervene...

I may be done eating for a few days. I saw Iron Man 3 earlier and blitzed my way through a pack of toffees... uuggh...

It's a wonder you have any teeth left to eat with

Dude, it was only one pack! It's not like I make a habbit of it!

It wasn't so much the tooth decay element of it that I had in mind, it was the sheer chewiness of it all

Probably though that was because I am a tad sensitive to that sort of imagery.

My Bruxism is given me grief so my teeth hurt and I have face ache

Oh that's too bad. I don't usually have that many sweet things in my house, because whenever I buy them, I generally eat them all in one day...

Truth be told I don't have much of a sweet tooth, but when I get a hankering I tend to scoff the lot

Lovely as this chit-chat is, I am worried that A) you know now the best way to poison me with is something with and anchovies in, B) should I be aware that I am being lulled in a false sense of security and C) is it all going to count against me if I apply for a job?

still trying the master the netiquette of the thread

Nahh, we have fun here. And don't worry, I don't poison people, all new employees here are required to swallow a nanodroid so I can kill them whenever I want. Non-employees are killed by the lasers mounted into every corner of the building. You'd think Persephone and the Doctor would be more respectful, with that in mind, but they slipped their droids into Kipper through his food.

Well, that is all good to know

I s'pose it is only fair to warn to everyone that I am perfectly capable at nattering on and so boring everyone to death...

* Flaps around in front of laser in the corner*

It seems to have switched the microwave on did you have anything in it?

No, all I ever eat is pavlova.

Um, did Persephone or A put anything it?

If I am going to die, I would like my first time on this thread to be a bit more spectacular than collateral damage

* backs away*

I think you should check, you do afterall have more experience at this type of thing

Ok sure. But for the record, I'm the one who does the dying around here. I mean, Persephone's a Greek goddess and the Doc's a space age Doctor, so I doubt it would phase either of them much, but still...

*goes into kitchen. Emmerges several seconds later.*

Ok, who was cooking a pipe bomb?

*checks eyebrows*

phew they seem to be ok and I don't appear to be roasted

er, sorry, you ok?

here have some pavlova, I didn't make it honest, or buy it from any Kraft suppliers who appear to have you on a hit list for taking out Mr Peanut

Thank you. *eats*. Wow, you're pretty self-concious about your eyebrows, hey?

Not self-conscious, I'm just fond of them, they are a family trait

and did I mention the superpowers?

You didn't! Tell me more!

I'm sure I mentioned that they could stop a class of pre-schoolers in their tracks and quell teenagers to a quiet conversation

you need more?



(just teasing)

no really I don't want to kill you,

and I'm not going to

Ah yes, I remember. I kind of want to see them now...

um there was meant to be a 'tell you' after the 'kill you'

I don't know if that makes more sense of the

or not