h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Y2K] Ancba ain't here.

[Ancba] [filtered voice-over] I am now.

[Several thousand horribly beweaponed starships come out of hyperspace]

[Ancba] [filtered voice-over] I would prefer to have my fleet comprise the outer defense, if I may. And I /do/ have two passengers. May I beam them in?

[On the assumption that KL will let them, two life-forms materialize: one droid designed (successfully) to look like, behave like, and be a young woman with blue hair and red eyes and wearing a black version of Deanna Troi's getup, and a pink octupus wearing a top hat and brandishing a mallet]

[Elizabeth] So, now we're here.

[Ultros] Yeah! Er, we'll go to where Ancba is s'posed to be!

[Liz] Regulation control system.

[Ultros] Er, yeah. Actually, I think I'll just hamper the heroes' efforts wherever I can.

[Liz] [annoyed] Fine, fine.

[Ultros] I think I've got stamina for [4] battle(s) now! I'm rarin'-to-go!

[Exeunt]

:: jumps up & down ::

(OOC) So, to get Zeb to his area, I should start a new forum within the OmegaMatic article, right? I HOPE so, cause that's what I'm doing. It would get WAY to crazy to battle in 17 different locations on the same forum.(/OOC)



Zeb: Ouch... urgh, I guess you guys aren't as rusty as I thought you might be. Come to think of it, that explosion was weaker than I remember. Shouldn't I have been blasted across the room, and in a lot more pain?



Zeb: ...wonder what the expiration on these things is... no, date's still good... lessee, "Can-O-Whoop... BUTT????!!!!" WHAT THE FREAKING-...??!!!

Dimmy: Umh, calm down there, sir.

Zeb: MY CANS HAVE BEEN SWITCHED TO A CHEAP KNOCK-OFF BRAND TO COMPLY WITH H2G2'S OVERLY-ZEALOUS NEW MODERATING!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!



(Zeb's Voice): ...RASSAFRACKIN' CRABBLEFRAGGIN' *BEEP* (*radio*edit*) MOTHA*BEEP*IN' DRAtbarnin' sonofa(*radio*edit*) kragraggin'... gawdd(*radio*edit*)*beebeebeebeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... (*radio*edit*)...

*Xerces appears in a large red and firey white flash. Salutes KL. Stands at position of attention, hands placed on the small of his back, shoulders streight, eyes taking everything in*
Sorry for my tardyness sir! I was off kicking the rear of pansy privite school boys in a bloody game of hockey until Yo summoned me. I'm at your service. Anywhere impeticular you wish for me to guard sir?

Ah, Xerces, let's see...you know, I'm not experienced with your fighting style, so I don't know where to put you. For a comical battle, I'd either send you to the Offices, or the Galley. But if you're in the mood for a serious battle, I'd put you in charge of Deffense Tunnel Teln. I guess...oh, I'll try you out in the Galley. I'll give you some special weapons, to! I know just what would stop those blasted heroes, should they get too far!

As for you, Happy, if you'll just check the listing that I put up earlier, I've already got you in a position in one of the Four Machine Sections. I forget which one, sorry. But it's up there.

Now, Ancba, as to your two guests,...

I have no problem with your mallet wielding kraken. However, I've got some concerns about Elizabeth where continuity is concerned. If you could put some restraints on her magical abilities, that would definitely help. The heroes would complain about her, say that she's too powerful for the rules of the game, etc. As long as she's got some handicaps, she would do great, though.

Oh, and just so everyone knows, I was originally going to post the locations before you, but I've got no problems if you do it for yourselves. It'll save me a lotta trouble.

*Nods to KL*
I guess I will give you a small backround on my fighting style, just a glimse thought incase someone may be listining in. I am very good with hand-to-hand combat, especially with bladed weapons and bows (yes bows are very useful at close range..no more info shall be given on that at this time). However I do enjoy comic fighting so place me where ever you see fit sir.

~one ship exits hyperspace, it goes largely un-noticed and one humanoid being beams directly to the Grav Dump. The ship abruptly turns round and jumps out~

*sea stumbles out of the bathroom, looking slightly green*

[sea] sorry, KL, i would have reported here sooner but i've had the WORST time IRL... sick, stressed, tormented... *sigh* anyway, i'm going to the neutrino thingy, right?

[Ancba] [filtered voice-over] Tell her to only use her sets of elemental spells. She has two for each "element" (Earth, Air, Fire, Water): one of them that does a whole lot of damage to one hero, and one that does half as much damage to all heroes present. She will complain, but she'll eventually comply when you tell her what you've told me. At least, if she doesn't decide to go one-on-one with Mackenzie, in which case, neither of them will be a problem for either side, except when one misses the other.

[Ancba] [materializing] On second thought, I think that I'll accompany Elizabeth to keep her in line myself. I don't like the fact that I'm one of the few people she seriously obeys combined with the fact that I'm not in the same room as she. [exits]

Yes, Ancba, have Elizabeth tone down her magic. I should see if I can make Mackenzie do that as well...oh, never mind, it'll all work out in the end, I'm sure.

Meanwhile, Sea, yes, I believe that you're in charge of guarding the Neutrino Burst Injector. Do not allow any hero to destroy the machine, or else. And keep in mind, this is without me checking the list. I may be incorrect.

As for you, Xerces, your skill with blades just reconvinces me that you belong in the Galley. I'll equip you with me own special version of the Vegimatic. It slices, it dices, it'll turn a heroes entrails into Julian Fries! It's pretty much a gigantic robotic suit with a ridiculous amount of blades. It's also got a pie launching feature, although I doubt that you'll use that. And if the heroes destroy it, you can just jump out, and fight them with your own weapons. I doubt they'll get through that!

But remember, you're one of the last lines of defense against the hereos! Especially watch out for Afgncaap5. He's not too shabby with a sword. For an amateur. If it weren't for all of that darn science equipment, he would have fallen a long time before now...

*Smiles are KL*
This Vegimatic suit sounds like it could be very useful. I think I shall have to try out the pie feature...any peticular type of pie you recomend or do they come premade for the suit? Shall I suit up and report to the gally now sir?

If anyone wants to see the robots, etc. that we have on our side, send me an email at [email protected] and I will send you the url. I'll put the url here for those of you who might see it before the moderators do.

[url removed by moderator]

...wow...

I second that, even though none of my characters are actually here.

...What he said.

*sea salutes*

[sea] okay, i'm off to the neutrino thingy then...

It's called the Neutrino Burst Injector!!!! It Regulates The...oh, never mind. Just protect it.

[ooc]we did make it for about 4 hours before the moderator spotted the url. Tisk, Tisk, they're falling down on the job. I'm glad they have a since of humor though.... MUhahahahahaha!

Your trusting me with a heavy machine gun ???