h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OK let's go.

*Finishes meal, pulls robowaiter on board, waits til mari has climbed in, then shuts the rear door*

~Sits behind his turret, with a big grin on his face. Waits for Deimosians to come out and play with him ~

*Sits toying with her machine pistol, absently turning the safety on then off, as she stares at the back of Kes's neck.*

You'd better wear kevlar, Kheldar

Wear what???

Kevlar, Kheldar is the stuff that makes bulletproof vests bulletproof.

(At least that is what it is called here - but I guess Kes
can tell you more. Hee-hee-hee, these alliterations are killing me )

The way mari-rae fools around with her weapons you are more likely to be killed by one of your own than by the deimosians

*shakes head, not particularly wanting to know where Kes' condensed cream came from - let alone where the would get freash*

How quickly can we get to the airfield?

*fiddles with and bodges her GPS system until it acts as a satellite television. ignores shouted requests for footie games and other such. finally finds the channel where Kuma is being loaded into a transport.*

We'd better hurry!

G7

*The sound of a safety catch clicking in close proximity disquiets Kes. He sticks his head into the driver's area and adjusts a couple of displays*

OK, G7 .. you've got the video feed and location on GPS. This screen gives you a superimposed map - it's a surface map, but most sewers run under highways ... and this one - hang on ..

*he sets some switches*

OK - this one gives you IFF - Identify Friendlies & Foes. Just remember that what shows as "Friendly" on here is actually an unfriendly to us. I've turned our squawk off, so we don't show as anything on their screens ... until they pick us on radar, of course.

*Without speaking he points out one possible route to the airport, tracing a finger across the screen. He goes back to his seat, and cleans his hand gun*

*clicks the safety on. Takes advantage of the down time to get in a short power nap.*

Zzzzzz...

*Puts hand gun away. With no-one to observe, he checks the insurance dogtags hanging around his neck, and tops up their charge from a power pack. Then he replaces the tags inside his vest. He hangs on as G7 rolls the APC over some obstacle ...*

*squinting through her eyelashes, she sees Kes fooling around with his dogtags. Wonders what that is all about???*

Maybe he's just checking if his service contract is still valid ?

*Looks up into the turret*
Hey Kheldar! You just check if your cannon's properly serviced ok? We need that contract to work every time!

*Hopes that Kheldar's cannon is indeed properly serviced*

Hey, G7, there's a beer in the back for you. *Smiles sweetly*

*Eagerly slides into the vacated driver's seat as G7 makes her way to the back*

Hah! My turn! Hang on to your hats! Here we go!

*Slams the APC into gear and reverses into a brick wall*

Oops! Ah, here it is!

*Finds the correct gear and the APC wheel spins it's route to the space port as Gwennie takes her eyes off the road to look over her shoulder at her companions who are speechless*

Why are you all crossing yourselves? Have we suddenly come over all religious or something?

Oh, look! Is that a roadblock ahead? Whee!

*Crashes and swerves through the road block as her companions struggle to take aim on the fleeing troops*

*Falls at Kes's feet. Looks up, dazed.*

*mari-rae looses her weapon - a round of shots are fired, one of them hits 's leg, another pierces (!) a window in the turret*

Yikes! Thank goodness 'twas me wooden leg!

Your good fortune, Pierce!
*Borrows mari's carbine, sets the safety on. Pulls her to her feet, and hands back the gun*
It happens - check through the rear doors - anyone following? .. and remember you're two rounds short of a full clip.

Gwennie! Check the screens. Anything else between us and the spaceport?

*Opens the bar fridge and throws cans to one and all*

*looks at her screen*

Shouldn't be anything between us and them. Except for the tarmac, that is...

*grabs hold of the nearest thing - which turns out to be 's wooden leg - as Gwennie rushes round another turn*

Pardon me!

Quite a well formed leg, though, .

G7

When we get there, I suggest everyone grabs a few gas canisters and a mask. We'll only get one chance, and gas should lay the guards out ... unless they're expecting it ... but we take that chance.
More beer anyone?

*Puts gas mask on, grabs a beer. Takes gas mask off, drinks beer. Puts gas mask on...*