h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*slaps Marie-rae to wake her from her nightmare *

You were screaming something about last beer...must have been a terrible dream.

*Looks into the empty beer fridge*
It was no dream ... but this is a nightmare! No cold beer, and Kuma about to come on board!

*Crushes now empty can against Linus'forehead...*

Let him drink juice.. haha!

This situation could turn far worse than what is happening outside!
I'd hate to get caught between an empty Barfridge and a thirsty Kumabear!

Anyone got a fast solution to this problem? I see that Wowbagger has scooped Kuma already... we don't have much time!

shazz

* empties his pockets*
Will this do till we get reinforcements: ?

Phew!

That should keep Kuma happy for maybe an hour... then we'll definitely have to think again!

shazz

So... will our brave, noble and borderline alcoholics replenish their stocks of beer before it is too late? Will the rapidly approaching Demosian Army know what hit them if our crew replenished their fridge and remembered their existence? And will Kumabear learn of the crew's deep dark secret? (probably not because there isn't one) Read on in the further adventures of... the BFGs!!!


Hmmm... we just don't suit that kind of build up, do we?

Bear's inside. Army's outside. Fridge is empty.
Two out of three ain't bad but this... this is terrible!

Hm, it seems we have only one chance left. Desperate situations call for desperate actions.

*Hands Shazz a map* Here are the coordinates of the nearest brewery that I know of...

...and here's the last available drink, Kuma. Hope it keeps you happy til we get there. Now, don't drink it all in one go, you hear? *hands Kuma a bucket filled with brake fluid he has secretly pumped out of the APC's breaks*

*Mutters to himself: Hell, who needs that fluid when there's a brewery to stop you*

HIT IT, Shazz!

Ouch!

When did I last look like an "it"?

*Rubs her recently assaulted-by-Shazz head*

Does anyone want a ?

*Extracts a very, very large bottle of vodka from her coat pocket and grins insanely*

Me - me - me - me!!!!

please?!!

*Steering wildly and somewhat erratically towards the co-ordinates Pierce has provided, mowing down various assorted Demosians on the way.*

Sorry about that Gwennie... strangely I spent some time around that place called h2g2 as a clone of 'Cousin It', so I should really have hit myself!

How come you have this map Pierce?
Are you sure it isn't a plant?

shazz

Someone sold it to me for a few bucks in that last place we were, Shazz. Said it might come in handy. Anyways, worth a try, innit?

Say, Gwennie, can I have some of that vodka intravenously? We are in a bit of a hurry, y'know?

So you want vodka intravenously delivered hey Pierce?

*Grins wickedly and produces a massive syringe*

It's okay. It's quite clean. My vet friend washed it out after she finished her latest batch of Foot & Mouth vaccinations.

Hehehe... maybe not such a good idea eh Pierce?

*Continues on course until a ramshackle hut appears in the viewfinder*

Is THIS the place? It doesn't look much like a brewery to me!!!

shazz

Yeah... looks more like one of those ghost towns you see in old Westerns. Look! A tumbleweed! _______________@

*Notices a road-sign, that reads: "Welcome to Ciudad de la Tumbleweed, home of the worlds largest underground brewery. Inhabitants: 2.446 brewers and mezcal-worshippers"

Isn't that a mineshaft behind that derelict building, Shazz?

If that's your regular vodka it'll probably have killed every living bacteria and/or vira, Gwennie, so lets have it! BTW: A vaccine against F&M might come in quite handy, don't you think?

Which reminds me: I'm famished!

I wonder if I can get a decent meat pie in this place? ....after a few beers, of course ....

Brewery or no brewery, I think it will probably be wise to go underground soon as the screen shows approaching aircrafts from 6 o'clock...

meat pies and beer? yucko!

Oh goody, going down under again.. Hope there are no giant spiders.