h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*drags in several assorted bags of dusty stuff from last year's Hallowe'en Ball*

*sprays a few webs in the corners*

*sprinkles dust around to help the Learner fly*

*pads walls to save *

*inspects Archangel Kes's special batch of *

*dips spoon in*

*spoon melts*


Everything's ready for Sunday's ceremony!

*walks in wearing "Matrix style" clothing and looking nervous*

~Skenvoy

*floating in, making sure there are plenty of comfortable armchairs for s and yet-to-be-s*

*samples Archangel Kes' PGGB*



*samples some more*

*drops into comfy armchair*

wonderin should i walk float or in here

oh goody plenty o paddin on the walls i need that the way i keep bouncin all over

oh n even better plenty o drinks think i,ll just ave a few oh n a few

oh look at me im
think i,ll just float here a while

hiya all

romani

*flies in, lands at the PGGB bucket*

*smells, rolls eyes, tastes*

limps in as has just dropped Tuba on foot

Tubaman

*arrives wearing her spookiest outfit*

*throws a few more webs about*

*picks up bucket of *

*drinks*

*licks lips*



I think it needs some more......

*pours in bucket*

*drinks*



Mussssssssh better..........

*staggers over towards Arch Titania*
Niche outfit.......Arch T....who are you? ?? I'm feeling a lickle bit...............

Seems that this time we are having extra good PGGB.

*gulps*

*enter *

*opens one eye*

*spies *

*opens another eye*

*flies past*

*opens yet another eye*

{I told you I was in my spookiest outfit}



Any more of that left?

*gold brick smacks AGB on the head*

* takes a *



* finds a comfy seat before the crowds arrive *

*opens another eye*

*spies a comfy lap*

*sits on comfy lap, careful not to spill J's *



*remembers*

*flutters in, careful not to disturb... um, anyone*


*reserves a seat right up close (by putting a in it), because she'll be a teeny bit late tomorrow*

*goes off to decide what to wear *

*Drags in another seasonal cauldron of PGGB*

There! That should keep the regulars happy for a while. Now ... let's get ready ...

*Gently removes the ceremonial Sainting Sword from its leather case, and holds it out at arm's length. Shafts of reflected sunlight dart around the room - due to the sword shaking.*

Ah! Needs a bit of adjustment!

*Consumes a large PGGB, and holds the sword out again.*

There! Steady as a wozzit!

*Presses a small button on the side of the hilt. There is a faint grrrrzzzzzzzzzzzzzllitt ! sort of noise, but nothing else.*

Darn! Flat batteries again!

*Rummages in pocket, opens hilt, inserts two AA batteries. Presses button ............ Zilch!

A cherub diplomatically points out that one of the batteries is in wrong way round.*

Ah, yes, of course! Thank you. Didn't have batteries in my day ... just a squad of small seraphim on exercise bikes, connected to a generator. Much more reliable ... mind you, the wires trailing from the sword got in the way of things a bit ...

*Switches battery around, replaces cover, presses button. The sword springs into sparkling life. Kes waves it around in practice. Two potted palms are savagely pruned, and one light fitting crashes to the ground.*

Good to know I haven't lost my touch! Just time for another PGGB, I think .....

hmmm...

it was interesting enough, and funny for that matter, but it just did not have that special touch, i must need a blaster

*picks up gold brick from the floor and throws it back up to GOD so it will be reloaded in time for my PGGB*

*sips pggb*

*waits for a brick to hit him square in the face*

*waits some more*

*waits...*

*waits...*

Screw it, i knew i should have sent him something less valuble!

* to take care of poor palms*

Kes

*looks down at the *





*tiptoes away*

*waves finger at palms*

*palms mend good as new*

*gold brick hits on head*



*goes off to attend to *

*stirs new batch of *

*tastes*
Excellent, Kes.
It just needs a little something......

*looks around*

*spies on seat*

*picks up and adds it to the cauldron of *

*stirs with spoon*

*spoon melts*

There.

Perfect.

*writes post-it note*
WARNING: NOT TO BE DRUNK BY LEARNER ANGELS

*sticks post-it note on side of cauldron*

*sprays a few more cobwebs around*

*disturbs a few *

* complains*


Go back to I'll fly over you.....

*flaps wings, hovers over *

*post-it note falls off cauldron, unnoticed by AGB*

*knock knock*

*AGB looks around*

I wonder who's knocking on Heaven's door?

*flutters over to open door*

*almost falls down when she sees Ritchie Valens*




*Ritchie Valens hands AGB a Special Invitation to the Sainting Ceremony*

*AGB reads*

"Ritchie Valens is requested to escort a Learner Angel named Miztres who wishes to be known as the Patron Saint of Lost Songs"

Very appropriate, Mr Valens.

Please come in and sit down, make yourself at home.
Can I fetch you a Special or a ? Or some of Archangel Titania's vintage ? I can recommend that...

*Ritchie Valens nods*

*AGB flies off to Heaven's Bar to collect bottle of for Ritchie Valens, humming "Tell Laura I love her" as she goes...*