h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Beatrice, that was such an elegant and vivid analogy...clever way to describe constrained writing.

*goes off considering wonky paintbrushes...*

Dear Mr Angelo,

Your tender to paint the ceiling of our chapel is accepted. You will start Sunday week after mass. In accordance with cl. 14 of the GCC please submit your programme of works.

Further, pursuant to cl. 40.1 of the GCC, you are directed to vary the scope as follows:

(a) Include emoticons at a frequency of 1 per cubic cubit.
(b) Characaturise the 12 prophetic figures (cl. 8 of Supp. Spec. A) by referencing the works of Walt Disney.
(c) Paint at least one "Kilroy was here".

Your success in this regard will guarantee that you will be acknowledged as a great painter centuries from now.

Yours,

Alexander Borgia
Pontifex Maximus

GCC?

General Conditions of Contract

Fish on the loose
What are you getting at this time, you contemptible ectotherm?
Are you perhaps suggesting that our magnificent enterprise is somehow trivialising your literary pretensions?

And I've just realised I can't count - 3 drop-outs, all beginning with M...

I mentioned this "Kilroy was here" http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap000302.html in my current FP article, do I get an extra point?

Ms GB

i probably wouldnt have had to drop out had my computer not chosen to die whilst in the middle of my lab report, i would like to know how 'Major Valentine' was scored by the public though. And like i said, i may join in later challenges.

mini

Pinniped a Zeppelin fan, eh? That's useful

And is that the first 10 of the comp? Well done Danny B: some cracking entries this week

Yes it is the first 10
Well done Bea on your position

Bravo indeed for the 10!

Disappointed that my last sentence was not obviously deliberately wrong - . Fair marks, though.

Gosh...

Well done Bea and Danny B!

I'm just relieved that my judge-marks this week weren't worse!

Crowd pleasing's obviously the key factor here *strokes chin comtemplatively*

Now, what shall we do with our 2 week break: I-spy, anyone?

Compete fair cop from Pin. Last week was a coast of epic proportions, and I'm marked accordingly.

Two weeks is a long time - hopefully enough time for me to get read of some RL stress and get my creative boots on.

Canberra did better than I expected. I reckon most here are just as busy, or more so - the real problem is I only see what's written, as opposed to what's in my head, if I leave something completely alone for two or three weeks.

Anyway ... seeing as they've left us idle, anyone up for limericks on the judges?

There was a hotelier from Devon
Whose idea of perfect heaven
Was a good game of cricket
With Dad at the wicket
And beer from seven to eleven


A glamorous Babe called Annie
Drooled over Brad Pitt in Armani
But she's the real star
Looks just like that Carr-
-ie Fisher from Star Wars – Uncanny!

A fin-footed mammal called Pin
Starting painting a wall from a tin
Rubbed his eyes in surprise
For behind the disguise
Was that bloke out of Led Zeppelin

Clerihews:

Skankyrich
had a wish -
a contest to make scream
every writer on the team.

The seal called Pinn
waved a proud fin
dismissed with contempt
our best writing attempts.

Galaxy Babe
came round with a wave:
"Your apostrophe's curly
please sort it out early."