h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*squint* I think you're right.

*Takes tighter grip of spanner and allows the light to glint off it in a menacing way*

Ok lets take a closer squint

*squints harder* Wait, let me wipe off my glasses. *wipe wipe*
Gah! The dust smeared! What do you see, Chrono?

I can see that you really shouldn't use an oily rag to clean your glasses

And that there is dirty great hole in the roof about a hundred feet further along the tunnel

Oily rag? *examine* Oh joy of joys. No wonder I'm blind.
*wipes glasses on shirt* Go ahead and check it out, I can't see a thing just yet.

Hmmm... the hole seems the exact shape of the filing cabinet... it must have been going at one frig of a whack to punch a hole in solid rock...

*looks up through hole into jungle*

But how did it get A hundred feet down the cave with no sign of bouncing or being dragged?

*cleans glasses off with clean shirt corner, then pokes head through hole*
Whoa...you're right, no drag marks no...do you hear something?

"Yes - unfourtunatly"

What's that sound, what do you think it is?

I think it's the sound of tension building

I agree.

Suddenly, out of the darkness lurches...

*hides behind Chrono*
A dragon? THAT'S IT?! It's just an English Greenscale. Pfft! They're mostly harmless. Just don't poke her/his belly.

What, like this?

...

Ummmmmmmmmm.......run.

*hides behind dragon*

*stops and looks back*
What? Hey, the dragon's rolled over. I think...yep, that's a female. She wants you to rub her stomach, Chrono!
(strange...females are usually more aggressive)

*happily begins to rub the dragon's stomach*

How's that feel m'lady?

*watches the dragon give Chrono puppy-eyes*
I think she REALLY likes you, mate! Wow. Wonder where she got that box of candy from so fa- oh, wait, it's not candy, it's kidneys.

A box of kidneys?

Has Captain Scarecrow been trdaing with dragons as well as me?