h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*The walkman ends up being rather more explosive than NYC thought, and the blow sends him into the far wall with a SMACK, after which NYC slides off the wall onto the floor.*

Is that it? I've had worse fights with my siblings! Take this!

*NYC unleashes his pride and joy: A shoulder-mounted howitzer, obviously heavily retrofitted from the original standard-issue version. He braces himself, and lets loose with a salvo, which screams past Poetry Woman and detonates in the initiation complex's break room. Innocent bystanders get severely injured. Poetry Woman looks impressed*

Impressed? Or perhaps that's what NYC student would LIKE to think!

One has to try harder than that to impress the incredible Poetry Woman!

Poetry woman catches her Shield of Dissonance easily, and heads off to check the pulses of the poor innocent bystanders. After all, is she not champion of the weak? Defender of the innocent? Believer in the Bystanders?

Then of course, she recites poetry at a nearby doctor who WAS on his lunch break, but will do ANYTHING (even cut it short) to get away from that Vile Verse!

Poetry Woman turns back to NYC with a haughty glint in her eye.

"You shouldn't have done that!
You injured a pussy-cat!"

She hikes up her spandex tights, and then, with a meaningful look at the NYC student, recharges the Shield of Dissonance and the Literary Taste Shield, and turns up the poetry beam to "Revolting Rhyme!"

"Oh villain foul, get thee gone!
This forum's a hero one!
So get away or be prepared
To be blasted into bits of air!!!"

, or

[Happy waves his 'Tickleing Stick™' about]

Now thats impresive

AAGH! that was AWFUL!

*Another salvo makes contact with Poetry Woman's Literary Taste Shield, which doesn't actually injure her but DOES leave a nasty looking dent*

*sea wrinkles her nose at the stench of bad poetry*

[sea] yes, i am bad. no, i am NOT a guy. i prefer to be called a villain... perhaps you will be more PC in the future.

*sea starts a small rainstorm above SMB's head, which rains on her poetry book and soaks the pages*

Holy Laughter, good guys!

A TICKLING STICK?!?!

Wot's that for, then?

, or (Poetry Woman to you)

awful ?? - you got no taste, no wonder the taste shield is so effective against you

A 'Tickleing Stick™' is used to

*sea, irate at being ignored, increases the rainstorm*

*three salvos make their way towards HappyDude. NYC subsequently re-holsters his howitzer and pulls out his baseball bat*

bring it on, poetry gal.

*NYC brandishes his trusted weapon menacingly*

Happy uses his 'Tickleing Stick™' to knock th salvos for six in fine cricketing fashion.

'Sea, I don''t suppose evilene is around anywhere ?'

*sea looks around the forum and spies evillene in a corner, motioning frantically for sea to ignore her. sea grins and opens her mouth, and evillene tackles her*

[sea] hahahaha - OOF - here she - OUCH - is - STOP IT - happy...

*SQUEALS!!!*

YOU DENTED MY SHIELD!!! Do you have any idea how much trouble I had to go to to get it in this shade of red? (Matches my spandex tights though, don't you think?

Is it just me, or am I incredibly outnumbered here? Where are my superhero buddies?

OK Then!

*hurls the Shield of Dissonance at the Tickleing stick*
*scoots away from the deluge .... and tosses away the poetry book.

"Sea, you've done it now!
You've forced me to improvise, and how!
For my powers reside NOT in my book!
But in my head! And uh.. YOU'RE NOT GETTING TO LOOK!"

And as for YOU NYC!! Don't think I'm cowed by your howitzer, even if I WILL have to take my Literary Taste Shield to the panelbeaters!
FOR I AM A MEMBER OF CHOPPERS! AND WE FEAR NOBODY!


And DON'T push me! I'll make up a CHOPPERS poem at you!

*Turns poetry beam up to 'Horrendous Hash'*

, or

Hi honey, you miss me ?

[CONTINUITY] A wooden tickling stick against a three white-hot explosive projectiles. Think about it. I will expect your apology soon enough. [/CONTINUITY]

SMoB? Hello? I have my bat right here, and I think you might want to meet it personally...

Happy pulls out his spare 'Tickeling Stick™'

You better not break this one - the rest are back at the Lab

When did I ever say it as wooden ? its made from the latest space age materials (well recycled SR-71's to be exact).

[OOC] even if it were completely invulnerable, which IT IS NOT, the force of impact would either break your arms, or break your ribs. Physics, man! Physics! [/OOC]

your forgeting about my superclown strengh although I do have do admit that you salvos weakened the 'Tickleing Stick™' to a point where it was vulnerable to poetry persons attack.

You know, if I just stay quiet for a moment, NYC student and Happydude will kill eachother without me having to do anything!


*Catches her Shield of Dissonance, which had hurled past the damaged tickleing stick, and sends it on a direct (and very powerful) collision course with the baseball bat


Why do I feel a powerful urge to sing the theme song to 'Captain America'?


, or