h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

if I was evil, really really evil, I'm half way through the training! I would have as my lair, What for it -- a new housing estate. All my workers would have to drive around occasionally around the site, sometimes putting up and moving for sale signs - but only evil employees would be able to own a house on this estate, as underneath it holds a secret, a deep dark secret - lair. The lair would cover the whole estate (approx 30 acres), and would have 10 stories, each storey would have an access code, depending on your rank, and access would depend how deep and evil you are.

Weapons of choice would be: sending the evil kids to the local schools to spoil your kids education, by disrupting classes (evilll), the evil adolesents would work at the local supermarket (evillll) - but not really caring if there was a nearby danagerous spillage!! The old people would drive very slowly around the nearby town causing accidents (evilllll).

The rest would work on the ultimate plan to take over and rule the world - we are going to set up a religion (evillllll!!!), based on a fable about a bloke who could heal people, who's mother was a virgin and dad was roughly based on some old thundery god with a beard. We will use this religion to rid the world of the evils of women, control the minds of many and make everyone feel very very very guilty for killing their one and only saviour. I'm still in training though, so need to have a bit more of a think of how I could get so many to follow such a devious yet obvious plan...