h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ok, now it's goodnight!

Well, it's not quite that time for me. I'm covering Mike A's order right now.

This is a reprisal order.
Please fire it to Mike A, at http://www.h2g2.com/U96026 .
The message should read:
"Congratulations! You are the one millionth netizen to access our web page at CareersInRoadSweeping.com! You have won a full-size brown tarantula, fresh from the Arizona desert! Open snowball to retrieve prize."

Thank you very much.

Snowball has been sent. With the prize inside. Please come again.

I'm gonna hang around this forum to annoy people now and occasionally order a snowball.

Okay, it's about time we had a sale. So how about this: if the person you're firing at is extremely recuperative, for no additional fee, we are able to fire a 40 ton snowball directly at them. As soon as they crawl from under it, we hit them with the rapid-fire gun, making them fall onto their backs. As they open their eyes, they see the next 40 tonner. I'm not going to authorize this sale just yet, but I think Garius and I should consider it. Besides, this was such a unique way to bookmark a post.

Sounds good to me. Now let me see. I shall send a snowball to The Great Unknown at http://www.h2g2.com/U106823 with the message *mrow?*

I can't do a thing about The Great Unknown. (S)he hasn't modified his/her user page, so I can't post a message. If you'd like, I can try and track him down in a forum and use the rapid fire, but I couldn't use the 40 tonner. Not yet, anyway.

Hey, can we have messages put on each snowball in this sale?

In the meantime, I think I'll have a conventional one fired at http://www.h2g2.com/U87448
Message: Wait and bleed
Watch the latest 5 articles on my homepage to understand it.

Seriously, do you think that:
1) I'd shoot Garius with a 40 ton snowball from a machine that he helped to build? Without him, I probably wouldn't be half finished with it by now.
2) that we wouldn't put target sensors on it so that it can never be aimed at either Garius or me? Even if I wanted to, I couldn't shoot Garius. Nice try, though. And sorry.

Any more orders?

Hmm.. I remeber now he had a very good reason for leaving his page blank...but anyway.

Orders anyone?

http://www.h2g2.com/U99500

Ok, maybe I'm pushing my luck...

Anyone curious as to what my message to Garius meant should look at:
http://www.h2g2.com/A275690

So how does the snowball sale work then? Can I totally bury Urchin or what?

Don't you think that 40 tons of snow would conceivably bury anyone? I mean, that's a *lot* of snow! However, you could just order multiple shots. That "sale" idea was just part of one of my old plans of global domination. BTW, yes, that was pushing luck. I wonder what 40 tons does at close range . . .

Er excuse me can I join this conversation : )

If Mike A burys me I'll send him another fake virus to scare the crap out of him again ha ha ha ha

Challenge extended.

So, Urchin, order a snowball on me why don't you .
I'm watching you like a hawk!

Challenge accepted.

Please could you hit

http://h2g2.com/U113890

with your largest snowball please...

Message reads"Welcome to H2G2"