h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Y2K] Ow, I don't care what universe you're from, that's GOTTA hurt!

tisk tisk... poor GL. too bad i don't feel bad enough for him to help him. and whoever said that the only problem now was to actually take over H2G2 was right. anyone have any ideas?
*waits*
i think i'll go cause some trouble while i wait...

you're right. I do feel sorry for the good GL.

*NYC pastes sticky note saying "please do not bang on cage"*

i feel better...

but, I said nothing about simply shaking the cage itself...

rrrgh, mmmph... this is a bit heavy...

A little help?

[Y2K] C'mon! Let's go blow up some houses!

[Y3K] I know! Let's do GL's!

[Y4K] Yeah. Let's arrange for half a dozen big vehicles to crash into it after it explodes. A Simpsons-style "adding way too much insult to injury"!

Now now, you know better.

FIRST we let loose a bunch of rabid skunks, THEN we blow up the house!

[Y2K] [Brooklyn accent] It's doable. [Not that there's much to accent in those two words]

*enters, followed by six rabid skunks*
why don't we just put the skunks in the cage with him? don't worry, they're my pets... they won't harm anything evil. but you'll need noseplugs...

hehehe...

*NYC passes out gas masks*

*bends down to the skunks and croons softly to them*
come on, babies... time to have some fun. in the cage, now...
*takes a gas mask and straps it on as the skunks crawl into the cage with the petrified-looking GL*

look! look at his eyes! almost as big as dinner plates!

that's an impressive shade of green he's turning...

*Takes off his shirt and covers his nose with it. Retreats to far corner of cell. Wishes Affy would hurry up and get back. Wishes he had fixed the transporter in his watch. Trys desperately to remember whether any of the other functions of his watch would be helpful in this situation.*

*Slaps forehead and mutters "d'oh". Changes to wolf form and snarls at skunks. Skunks halt their advance and begin to back up. They stand their ground at a distance of about 10 feet. The standoff continues.*

you know, this is turning out to be a lot less fun than I remember it being 20 minutes ago...

*Lunges towards skunks, who flee in panic - straight towards NYC*

[Y2K, seeing the disaster doing its best to be about to happen, uses the Force.]

[The skunks, hearing their equivalent of a whistle behind them, turn around and see, where the werewolf had been, a cute, sexy, female skunk. They rush toward her, and Y2K stops using the Force. The illusion vanishes, and the skunks explode.]

[Y3K] Pe-yew!

*mouth drops open*
you didn't have to KILL them, you know.
*sniffles*
i could have called them off.
*eyes fill with tears and she retreats to a dark corner of the room to cry*

now look what you've gone and done!

c'mon! I'll take on the lot of ya!

*NYC does his best impression of a drunken rage, pausing only momentarily to take off the gas mask*